What advice did your parents tell you about Hanky Panky?

15 comments

1. ‘You’ll learn when you’re older’

   By golly, they were correct about that.

2. From my dad:

   One time, there was a dog walking next to a train track wagging his tail. A train went by and hit the tail, clipping off the very tip. The dog turned around in shock to look, and the train took off his head.

   The moral of the story is to never lose your head over a piece of tail.

   Also, use condoms.

3. Just to use condoms, they expected everything else to come naturally

4. “Wear a rubber.”

5. Mum said don’t shame the family and dad said use a durex and don’t get caught

6. As a parent now, the advice of wear a condom and be safe is about all you can say. Anything more and we’re verging into weirdo territory.

7. “If the bed is rockin’, don’t come knockin'” -My Father

8. I was a recluse in high school. I did not go out at all and I had no friends. My parents didn’t have to give me a sex talk because I knew the basics already and I had no intention to get a girl knocked up at 16.

9. From my grandfather: “it smells funny, looks funny, and sounds funny”

   Dude wasn’t wrong…

10. Keep it in your pants, and you won’t have a problem.

11. Fuck, cheat, never tell a soul, wear condoms.

    3 are rights though.

12. Use condoms, only have a kid when you know you’re ready, don’t stick your dick in crazy. My dads sound advice

13. Let’s see if I remember this right…

    First, you put your left hand in, but then you take it out. Then you put it in again and I guess you’re supposed to shake it around a lot.

    Wait, I think I’m getting this confused with something else, imma have to ask my dad about it next time I see him

14. “All women want is your sperm and your money!”

15. I think that there was an old timey show called that.