Just need to vent about how frustrating it is wanting to date people and have meaningful relationships while managing the intensity of grad school. I’m in a two year program that’s also located in the middle of nowhere, making it really difficult to meet people outside of my small academic bubble. I also don’t want to start a serious relationship with someone settled down in the area when I’m planning to move out of state for work after graduation. I made the awful mistake of dating someone else in the program (a second year student) during my first year – after half a year she dumped me for another second-year student. (Don’t shit where you eat!)
This may come across as whiny, but it can feel frustrating spending precious years of your life (early 20s for me) in an environment that is not at all conducive to romantic relationships.
5 comments
>I’m planning to move out of state for work after graduation.
So wait until then.
The “precious” years of your life is sacrificed for grad school. A sacrifice that you made as an adult. You could have graduated highshcool, moved into a much larger population centre (any major city in the US) to live. You enrolled in grad school. It’s a slog, but 2 years is nothing and you’ll be moving and working independently soon enough.
I’m with you, I was in the military and got out. Now doing EE degree. I’m 31 and still have at least 3 years left. Going to be 35 before I can settle
Okay so you’re in a 2 year program, and from your post it seems you might already be in your second year. I don’t see the issue in you waiting a year or less to start seriously dating? A year isn’t a long time when accounting for the rest of your life.
Also a graduate student and I relate. A few months into my degree I decided to forget dating and just focus on school, so many people I know (myself included) get into relationships in their 20s that go nowhere/end in breakups anyway, so why bother getting bent out of shape over it when I’m too busy anyway? …and I met the guy I’m currently dating immediately after deciding to put romance on the back burner. Anecdotal of course, but honestly not worth sacrificing grades/what limited social life you have trying to get dates if you plan on leaving anyway.
Grad school is great for caual sex. Use this time to gain experience from hooking up but not with other people in your program. You’ll be better prepared for a relationship when you graduate and less lonely in the meantime.