I need advice, I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year and we love each other it’s a really healthy relationship other than a couple arguments here and there but everyone experiences that, we’re able to get through it. For about 4 months we’ve had this problem lingering above us that we can’t work out, we are young and he isn’t sure if he’s a relationship person or not, he says he loves me but he’s also young and feels we are too much like married couple. He said when he was single that’s all he wanted but now he’s got that he’s unsure if he wants it forever or wants to be single and experience life together. I’ve sat him down today and explained to him I need and answer because I won’t go on wasting my time if he decides in three years he doesn’t want a relationship but he said he just can’t figure the problem out he can’t imagine life without me but can’t imagine being tied down forever, has anyone experienced the same issues I’m really tired of this issue I feel like I can’t start my life because if we break up I’ll have to move away and stuff, any advice would be amazing.
2 comments
If he cant figure it out that means he doesn’t want to be with you.
Stop waiting for him to make a decision about your life for you. You don’t have to put your life on hold for him or anyone.
You deserve to be with someone who knows they want to be with you. Since he can’t seem to make a decision, make one for yourself. You are young and it’s normal for people your age not to be ready to settle down with someone forever. If that is what you are looking for, I’m sorry, but he’s not it.
Even if you dated for another 3 years and things don’t work out, that’s not a waste of time. You are still getting life experience from it. Not all relationships are going to be forever right off the bat or last long at all. That’s the point of dating. Finding out what you want or don’t want in a partner, how you behave, learn and grow in a relationship are all good things. The more time you spend with someone the more you learn about them, and that is a good thing. People don’t just show you who they are right away. You need time get to know them to see if you really are compatible long term. A year of dating might be enough for you to say you want forever, but it might not be enough for them. And that’s ok. It’s not a race and he’s not stringing you along. You guys are 20.
You also have a choice. You can enjoy your relationship right now for however long it lasts, or end it and find someone else who’s on the same page as you.