Dated this guy for almost 2 years. We were in our 20s and both each other’s first “real” love, as in like not a puppy love type of thing and started to plan a life together. I’ve never felt anything like I felt with him. We grew a lot within our relationship, but then eventually realized some incompatibles. Been almost a year since the breakup and my heart still drops when I think of him or the thought of him with someone else. I know I’m not in love with him anymore and I truly do want him to be happy, but a part of me still gets a little sad knowing it won’t be us in the end. We loved each other so much and both learned that love isn’t always enough. I’ve been actively going on dates and not comparing anything to my past relationship, but just realized how truly special it is to find someone that you love so much. Our love was the type of love that has made me look more for compatible people going forward, which just feels kinda of forced? My ex was my best friend and favorite person and throughout the breakup we always toyed with potentially getting back together after figuring ourselves out. That’s definitely not gonna happen
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Probably different for women since you ladies pair-bond differently than men do and likely get more emotional ‘feels’ than we do, but for me, in the past (married now) I would get over a breakup in around a month’s time. I’d stew in depression for about 2-3 weeks and then get rid of all the ‘stuff’ from the relationship like pictures and mementos and then try to start dating someone new and that usually helped me get over the person.
Best of luck I hope you feel better soon.
When you finally stop thinking about them. Then and only then will it stop hurting. Your first love is never easy to get over but it takes effort. Live your life even when it feels forced because your heart will eventually catch up to your brain. You will also fill your brain with more memories that don’t include him which is a good thing. Date with an open mind and be sure you don’t compare new guys with your ex and you’ll be fine!