I’m an NPC, how can I overcome that, I barely make small talk and can’t hold conversations

18 comments

1. You practice and practice, put yourself in embarrassing and social situations

2. Exposure

3. Learn how to do something new

   Pay attention to the world around you and make comments

   Pay attention to what people say and respectfully offer another point of view

4. You don’t overcome that. You ARE going to make blunders but that’s also what the confident do. You just care more for awkward moments.

   I know because I’m the same

5. Get a job standing by the front gate, where your only duty is to tell the adventurers as they walk in “Welcome to Cornelia”

6. I have always felt the same my friend. I find that, although people can sometimes laugh at me instead of with me at some of my comments, I do get more attention if I just carry on with my stupid comments. I have learned that, even though I don’t hold much self confidence, I should just have a “I don’t give a shit what other people think” attitude to what I wanna say and, as long as I don’t say anything offensive, I can get away with anything, no matter how embarrassing it might be to myself, as long as I laugh at myself, people respond. If they don’t like me much, feck’um. Just avoid saying offensive things that’s all.

7. Dig deep, find your inner strengths, and build on them. You’re not an NPC, but if you allow yourself to believe that- you’re going to look like one to everyone else.

8. You can hold conversations if you’re genuinely interested in the other person. Small talk is just different and tedious.

9. Hmm… my good man. I must not only speak to you as a man but also as a DM for DnD. Unfortunately, I am only half kidding. The point is you need to go out and do something that resonates with you. Get a hobby, try something new, etc. along your way you are going to run into people and you may even need to ask them for help or to explain something to you. This is how you are going to start building connections, and making friends to go with and potentially meet even more people. I know it may seem daunting, but once you push yourself once you will feel better.

10. Experience is the only thing that will diminish fear.

11. Internet discourse about real humans being NPCs is so backwards.

    In most video games the main character talks the least out of just about anyone. A lot of the time, the main character doesn’t have a single line of dialogue. The zaniest, most outgoing characters are usually NPCs. 99% of the monologues you’ve skipped were delivered by a non-playable character with no free will. If anything, being quiet and about your business makes you a main character. There’s nothing wrong with being quiet, you could even leverage your lack of talking to build a cool mystique about yourself.

    If you want actual advice on how to talk to people, a starting point would be to improve your self image. If you enter every social interaction believing that you’re uninteresting and lack agency, then you are just giving yourself permission to be exactly that. No one has ever broken out of their shell believing something so negative about themself. You need to have faith that you’re interesting before you actually achieve the status of being interesting. Having faith in yourself will unlock your potential.

12. Two things got me over that;
    1, I trained myself to stop caring how other people saw me.
    2, I learned to like myself more (still working on that part, tbh).

    The more I focused on my self-image, and the less I focused on other people’s opinions, the more I began to feel like the main character of my own story, instead of an extra in someone else’s. It was a long, hard road to get here, but it was worth it.

    Edit: Also, I realised that I’m simply no good at small talk, and stopped trying. I can have 1-on-1 conversations, but I tend to be pretty quiet in a group setting. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

13. I was gonna help you, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

14. Find something that interests you that you can talk to people about. I’ve gotten several people into Byzantine history.

15. go to the gym and lift heavy weights. make sure u get a good workout with your t levels soaring. take 5 shots of whiskey back to back afterwards. Now you’re ready to talk to anyone.

16. What lines are you programmed to say NPC?

17. Ask the developer to give you more charm, etiquette, and/or haggling.

18. Find better friends. If they really were your friends they would be interested in you and your feelings.