Hello to everyone, i come to ask this question, because when i write people on Instagram or Whatsapp, i write more than them, i dont know if i give off clingy or needy vibes, or i have to give back the same energy they give me, but here is some examples of what i want to explain :
Example 1:
Me: Hello brother! How are you? Do you want to come to grandmothers house?
Brother: Im working
》》》 Instead of “Hey brother, how are you? Right now im working”
Example 2:
Me: Hello John, How are you? Could you send me your before pic?
Client: How are you
Client: of course
Client : (pic shared!
Me: Thank you so much bro 👌🏻🚘🎙
》》》 Leaving me as seen, instead of saying, “you are welcome”
Im i missing something? Or im giving too much energy and being taken for granted? Do im settling for less? Maybe i use too muh emojis? Do i did a mistake for saying “Hello brother, how are you?” And instead i should hace said “do you want to come to grandmother house” only?
I appreciate your advice
PD : i think i found something, it sounds like it could be an Passive aggresive texting
PD : searching more, about the 2nd example: it seemed rude to me, that he didnt replied my thank you, and in the first one, my brother didnt replied to my “how are you” and even he didnt greet me, he went directly to my question, i think is both their faults, i wasnt needy or anything like that, they was disrespectfull
PD: Maybe im overthinking
PD: thank you very much for all the advice! In my opinion, it could be that im long winded during textig? Which maybe anoys them? Maybe i use too muh emojid too wich it looks unnecesary
16 comments
Have you tried asking for bobs and vagene
I think it’s because texting is meant to be short and right to the point. For example, when I’m with my friends we talk and have full conversations. In text, we don’t even say “hey”, just straight to the point. “Did you take the bus today or you walked?” “Bus” “oh okay”
Also, the emojis don’t make sense. You’re saying thank you, but adding a car and mic… singing in the car? I would be like “thanks bro 🙏🏾”
Personally I wouldn’t care or notice if someone texted me the way you text, but if I was expected to do the same I would rather chuck my phone at the wall. If I have to send a text that’s more than two sentences it better be an interesting conversation that I actually care about. If I can answer a question in two words, the message is going to be two words.
You’re definitely overthinking this. They’re not being rude. You’re just expecting a lot of performativity out of a form of communication that’s supposed to be short and sweet.
Bro why are you trying to hold long convos or start meaningless small talk with texting? You ask a question, I reply. Simple, if you want a full on convo then phone them.
I do this all the time because i just can’t be arsed to write whole novels when 1-2 word answer is good enough.
I think it reflects the other person not you. And also, you shouldn’t expect some full of energy response from other person if you are responding with full of energy. Not all people are that expressive, some expressive and some don’t.
In my opinion, as long as the other person responding your message and responding with some information that you need, it’s a bare minimum. The other person doesn’t have a responsibility to respond your message cheerfully.
You’re treating texts like phone calls
People aren’t thoughtful. I think those who reply with same energy or leave after reading would do the same in real life too if we couldn’t see them . But some people like the old ones can’t really type that much so they do that. Yolo
Your up here and there down there self explanatory
Great question op, no advice to give, in fact I now have questions 😬🤣
For those who say texts are supposed to be short and sweet.
Um, I am in my 40’s. We used to call and speak to one another. Now we text, seems accepted and preferred by most. To the younger, the only thing they know.
When was I supposed to know, that text was meant to be short and sweet though? Particularly when most my age has been accustomed to and is aware of phone etiquettes.
A phone call being handled using this (text short and sweet fashion) just idk would be weird.
And yet both have the goal of relaying information or obtaining information or giving information.
Had Ops texts been via phone call, this line of answering would have been (____) idk the word that best fits there. Strange possibly.
I am this person. Sometimes it takes too much energy just to open and read the message… And I certainly have to gather strength to text back. And you are asking for emojis..
Also, there is a great technique – assuming positive premises. Yeah, it might be their fault, they might be rude with you intentionally, they might want to hurt your feelings because they are angry about you. BUT. They also might be just tired, or they might forget to text back, without meaning something rude/offensive. You probably will never know true reasons, so it doesn’t matter what you assume. And because of that you will profit more of positive assumptions
But… does it matter?
To some people, they will do that because they are extremely annoyed, and some people will do that for no reason, they love you to death but that’s how they chat.
so, does it matter? it’s best to go through life not making assumptions out of tiny things.
You have a certain set of rules and expected behaviors, they have another. Those two rarely overlap a 100% but as long as you expect other people to behave exactly the way you think is right, you’re gonna have a bad time.
People have a 1000 things going on in their lives, and whatever reason you can think of for them doing what they do – it’s almost never correct.
I’d bet this also slips into your verbal conversations with people. You may be over sharing, or trying to make too much of a connection in what’s designed as a quick information swap (text)
Personally, I dont like “filler” in conversations. The ppl im truly close with get no pleasantries at all from me. But my work emails are 5 layers deep with fake pleasantries ect ect.
You’re being too formal and wordy with short message formats. Keep it brief