Looking back on life so far (I’m nearing 40), operating with a life philosophy of doing ‘future me’ favors has put me in a good place. I think this advice applies to most of the questions posed to this forum.
Operating with a mind towards your future self is a heuristic for being happier as you age. Do not expect perfection. You’ll not always be consistent. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. And ask how can you can respond to the various mistakes of life that benefit your future self.
In fact, expect mistakes and hindsight bias to come with time. You’ll have a better idea of the future if you think this way. But, be kind to yourself. Keep yourself focused forward. Consider what your future self would like you to have done in the present moment. Do those things.
There are infinite versions of your future self, so consider yourself at distinct points in the future. Tomorrow you. Next year you. Five-years hence you.
Some instances of this type of thinking that have served me well:
Working hard. It always feels great. My workplace is a bit of a shit-show at the moment, but what gets me through is I go in and I try my best. Results vary, but I try. This served me in my education as well. I didn’t work hard at studies until post secondary. But changing this during university has been a tailwind in life.
Choosing a life partner. The most important decision most of us make in life. Think about your future self, imagine your future family if that’s something you want, and ask what kind of partner would serve those interests. I simply made the primary goal of my dating to ‘find the woman I want to mother my children.’ This led me to an amazing woman.
Find things you love in life and do them. The universe is the limit here. People like different things. It depends on your personality. Some want to climb a mountain, others take a nap at the base. I love reading, so I always give myself time for that. It lets me escape real world troubles, it engages my mind and my reading and writing and communication skills improve as a result. After decades of compounding the benefits of reading, I’m now paid for my reading, writing and communication skills. Giving yourself time for your passions will serve you well in life.
Frugality is another characteristic I appreciate my past self for. A decade ago I was a graduate student on a fellowship. I lived in a high cost of living city on very limited funds. I ignored most consumeristic tendencies and fostered a simple lifestyle. I’ve kept spending like a graduate student since, and saved the rest of the money for my future self. Present me is glad I did. I have less debt, more cash and less physical things (which I find to be a burden) than I otherwise would. I’m happier for it.
Just some thoughts for this Saturday morning. 🙂
1 comment
OK. Good idea.