What’s something you used to believe about relationships, but no longer do ?

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1. That relationships gurantee loyalty and commitment. They don‘t.

2. That I’d get into one. Has been 12 years since I had hope.

3. I used to believe that relationships should be 50/50. Now I realize that it’s not always possible or realistic for things to be exactly equal, and that it’s important to communicate and compromise with your partner.

4. I couldn’t tell you why, but I used to think all relationships could 100% work if both people just wanted it enough. It took me until I was married to figure out that that’s not true at all. There are many, very real factors, that can make two people very wrong for each other.

5. That it’s just 100% fun and cute dates. It actually takes communication, vulnerability(something I’m not the greatest at), compromise, and being intentional to sustain a good relationship.

6. It’s normal to scream and fight pretty often, it’s normal to hate the person you are married to after a few years- and that’s funny. All guys cheat.

7. That breaking up is a bad thing.

8. All you have to do is love each other and, everything will work out.

9. That they need to last forever.

10. That if they were “right”, they’d be effortless

11. That there is a perfect person for you. There isn’t. There’s compatibility, communication and consistent work in making each other feel seen, appreciated and loved.

12. I used to believe that those who only had their significant other as their friend was a sign of them being controlled, but now that I’m married and older I see that it’s just a lot harder to maintain friendships with people now a days for a number of reasons (kids, work, mental health stress, parental health etc) and hanging out with your partner is almost always a guaranteed hang out buddy. It truly isn’t easy maintaining friendships when you get older whether or not you’re the married one or single.