I 21M have a little crush on my 21F private piano teacher, and I can’t stop being attracted to her. Not that there is an interest in conflicts. It not for school, and we both are adults, but I am afraid if I tell her, regardless how it turns out, I might lose a teacher since she teaches really well, and I take music very seriously. I respect her professionalism also not want to make her feel uncomfortable. Also, none of my crush ever like me back, so its not like this time will be different anyway.
I also feel really bad because i tend to attract to people with certain personality traits, and sometimes these traits are more common in teachers. I really hope i don’t attract to specific type of people so easily.
Any advice on what I should do?
Tl;dr: I have a crush on my piano teacher and don’t know what to do because I don’t want to make her feel uncomfortable and she teaches really well. But at the same time, I can’t stop being attracted to her
3 comments
You may lose a teacher, but you also could gain a relationship.
Keep us updated.
Do you have any indication that she likes you? If not, keep it to yourself.
It’s good to build up a friendship first. There’s no rush. Get to know each other. Figure out her likes and interests. Let her figure out yours.
You don’t have to answer this out loud but do you think you could be confusing the encouragement for romantic attraction? I’m trying to be gentle, but I think this is a common male experience because there’s not a lot of spaces where you’re nurtured outside of family or partners.
This is why a lot of guys develop feelings for teachers, therapists, when you *don’t actually know them* – there’s a confusion between presence and intimacy. She’s nurturing a skill, which is music and something you care about. Sometimes these wires get crossed emotionally.
You seem self-aware and introspective, so I encourage you to leave the situation alone and look into this. Cultivate self love and build a support system. You’ll be okay and you’ll find someone great some day 🙂