EDIT: should’ve titled it as “should i leave\* our groups after hurting one of our friends?”

I recently hurt a friend \[23F\] that I romantically like too and she soft-blocked me on different social media a few days after the incident. I’ve tried apologizing but she won’t read my messages anymore, which I understand because from my POV, what I did was unforgivable.

I’m of course regretting and ashamed for what I did, and I don’t know how to move forward. But right now, my priority is just to make sure I’m not being an even more burden for her by respecting what she wants. So I’m also trying to keep my distance from her and our common friends, as to not remind her of what I did and to keep our common spaces comfortable for her. Last night, I saw she posted something along the lines of “it’s so hard how our circles are so small and interconnected.”

I’ve realized, maybe I should completely pull away from our friend groups because, after all, I’m the one in the wrong here. I hate to do it because I care so much about them, but I can’t keep hurting and making her uncomfortable. I’m planning to leave our group chats and never contact them anymore. But I’m not sure if that’s a good idea or it will look like I’m fishing for sympathy. Like I don’t want to make this about me because it obviously isn’t, but I really don’t know what to do anymore. I just want to stop hurting her. 🙁

TL;DR! : My friend is having a hard time being in her friend groups because it’s almost all interconnected with me and I’ve recently hurt her. So, is it a good idea to be the one to leave our common groups so she can be more comfortable being with our friends?

4 comments
  1. If her, then: it wouldn’t do no good. The damage you’ve done was exactly what I mentioned in the beginning when I explained why I kept it guarded all these years. You did what you did. Your mission was accomplished. Enjoy the spoils of victory. Pulling away from the ones you chose ove me will do nothing for me. You won. Enjoy your victory….

  2. Well that was a long, rambling, and vague post.

    Based on the information provided, I’m going to say a definite maybe.

    Honestly, if I hurt a person romantically I would apologize and try to give them space. My friends should have little input on my romantic life.

  3. You’re refusing to say what you did, so I’m wondering how bad it really is. Like, if it’s catastrophic and unforgivable, maybe you should?

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