What action/sentence crushed you from the inside, yet you acted like it didn’t even matter?

4 comments

1. this girl i really liked, for a long time, had been flirting with me since i told her i liked her. this had been over the span of close to two years. everytime we partied or drank, she’d kiss me, but it was always so odd and distant, but never far enough where i could let go. she held me just close enough where i couldn’t move on, and i didn’t know if i needed to or not. anyway. after that bullshit, she’s still flirting with me, and one night, i text her. i’m all giddy and blushing as i ask her what she’s up to, and i get the response, “just hanging out with my boyfriend” with a photo of one of her closest friends attached. i barely knew him, i only knew him through her, but i resented him before i really even met him. it crushed me. it was a scream-cry into the pillow kind of heartbreak. i said something along the lines of ‘what the fuck ?’ and she didn’t even seem to care.

2. “Actually we all hated you for the longest time!” (This was after I told them I’m glad I got to be their friends)

   Nowadays I struggle to trust that new friends actually like me.

3. When they said to me about have they cheated on me and lied to me about being a virgin when taking my virginity and also that they had lied to me about loving me sometimes

4. So this is very recent

   I was with my now ex and father of my child for 9 years. 6 weeks ago he started sift ghosting me and still is. I’ve kept it together in the outside and you’d never know anything was going on. On the the inside however I’m a mess of sadness and anger and unanswered questions.

   It’s beyond crushing to know that he didn’t and doesn’t care, but I will continue riding the hidden rollercoaster of emotions internally and not let anyone know how I really feel.