I’ve been talking to a guy for 3 months. Both 27. We are long distance by a few hours. We met online and have been on a few dates and have been intimate. Last night l decided to have the talk and asked him how he was feeling about things between us and if he’d be interested in pursuing anything further at some point. He said because we’re long distance, he doesn’t want to put a label on anything because he doesn’t feel he could adequately provide what the label entails from a distance to make me happy. He said he would hate if promised plans had to change or if he couldn’t get off work to visit because he doesn’t want to upset me, and since he wouldn’t be close to me he doesn’t think he’d be able to make me happy. He said if he were closer he’d definitely want to pursue a relationship.
Previously we had discussed him wanting to move to the city where I am. He’s very much interested and I confirmed last night he’s still interested, he just doesn’t know when that will happen and doesn’t want me get my hopes up if it takes longer than expected. He said he’s definitely still interested in me and would love to continue talking in the interim and maybe plans will fall into place, but it’s ultimately my decision on how to proceed
I really like him and would love to make it work. I’m afraid continuing to talk to him will only make it hurt more in the end if we were to part ways, but I don’t want to lose the passion and friendship we have. He plans to come visit next month and I’m not sure what to do
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He’s being very pragmatic and what he’s basically saying is that he doesn’t want a long distance relationship to happen for the reasons stated. Makes sense but the question then becomes, if the facts aren’t changing (he’s based here you’re based there) then what does it take for him to want to commit? You probably have to realistically prepare for this going nowhere or not getting the full commitment you might want