I tutor a guy who quite honestly in hindsight seems like he wanted to date me from the get go. Mentioned he’s a doctor in his response to my ad (who does that) and has thrown the suggestion a few times now that we should grab something to eat outside of tutoring. The first time was because it was late and we were near a food court. The second he asked if I want to do activities outside of tutoring like rock climbing and the third came last week when he texted me he learnt the vocab for food items and menu ordering, and he suggested going to dinner “for practise”.

I gave him a pretty clear no, stating it was unprofessional and if he does it again I will cancel our tutoring agreement (there is nothing legally binding here, I just felt it sounded more classy than he’s been acting). I also cancelled our session and said IF we continued tutoring I do not want to organise anything until the following week.

He responded with a “sorry I just wanted to get to know you, I’m still interested in meeting this evening if you are” which was so BULLSHIT because it clearly ignored my request to cancel our session that night and twisted the narrative as though I am crazy to think he was making clear advances on me. (If asking your tutor to an out of session meal to practise a foreign language in an English speaking country is not a clear date, idk what is).

So here’s the thing. Since that exchange, I have decided I really, really don’t want to do lessons with this man anymore. He hasn’t paid me for our last session (which I’d rather forget about if it means I don’t have to interact with this dude anymore) but also he’s messaged me again tonight asking if I’m free for another lesson because he is highly keen.

My question is: what do I do? Do I ghost him? What do I write back? How can I cut this off cleanly, since he doesn’t seem to listen to my messages anyway.

5 comments
  1. You can ghost or you can tell him his unprofessional behavior is not acceptable and you will not be working with him any more. If he persists after that, block him.

  2. Tell him that you aren’t available anymore and suggest him to find another teacher, even give him a number (give him a male teacher number) and say you are cutting contact with him

  3. Ghost him before his comments become unwanted physical contact. Dudes like that think the world is theirs and everything in it.

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like