How would you feel if your partner went through your phone, implying consent? Would there be something you’d never let them see?

16 comments

1. Honestly wouldn’t mind, not to say that a conversation with another doesn’t turn into some form of playful flirting, but the trust and transparency with my partner makes me comfortable with sharing what’s on my phone

2. Transwoman here. If I’m in a relationship with someone, I’m committed, open, and trust them. I don’t need to hide anything, but there are photos of old girlfriends that may not go over so well.

3. He has access to my phone and checks notifications for me pretty often. I doubt he’s ever looked through it though. I don’t mind if he does, I’m pretty boring.

4. Even if I had nothing to hide (which I definitely do hahaha), I feel like at the very least a lot of messages are sent by other people in confidence and shouldn’t necessarily be seen by anyone else.

5. As long as they don’t judge me for the 48 open tabs of fanfiction and smut, we’re cool.

6. He can look at everything BUT my notes app. It’s 99% embarrassing bullshit “ideas” with no context that seemed cool when I wrote them down.

7. Whatevs. Truly private stuff like financial information is behind a password and 2FA that they will only have access to if I die. Everything else on my phone rn is boring or they already know about it.

8. All he would find is that I’m very angry with him and quite resentful of him right now.

9. He could access my phone if he wanted. We both know each other’s passwords and go in to change music or take photos, etc. It would be a bit odd as we just don’t go through each other’s stuff like that, but the only thing I’d be bummed if he saw are the vows I’ve started writing for our wedding.

10. [removed]

11. They would never have consent for that. I don’t even really have anything all that private, but there are things like my original writing, my fanfic accounts, over a decade of pictures, every social media I have, etc. that I would never want someone to be cruising through with no context or monitoring.

    The way I see it, it’s not even a trust issue so much as me being an individual person with some parts of me that are for me alone.

12. I really wouldn’t care. We’re both quite open with our devices and there’s no *this is mine, this is yours* as we’ll both sometimes ask each other to send messages from our phones when we’re working, check notifications, etc.

13. My partner has my full consent and knows my password, so I’d feel fine with it. I have absolutely nothing to hide because I am an open book (to mostly everyone).

14. Yeah, all the notes I write about him.

15. I have a running list of gift ideas in my notes that I wouldn’t want him to see, but that’s all.

16. I don’t have anything on there that he’d be upset about, but I’m a fairly private person and I write down a LOT of random notes and lists and things I don’t want to forget and idk I just don’t like the thought of other people reading that stuff