How do you do ok choosing to be single?

18 comments

1. For me it’s the opposite. I’ve been single for a long time and I’m absolutely sick of it but I just can’t find a partner. I’m really frustrated by how much time, energy and also money I’ve invested in trying to meet someone only to fail time and again.

2. I prefer solitude.

3. as long as i have some solid friends, being single doesnt bother me too much. im 23 and have been single all my life, but i have some friends that i talk to and play games with regularly which helps with the inevitable feelings of loneliness

4. *I didn’t choose the single life, the single life chose me.* 😂😭

5. Being single is much easier than a fucked up relationship. If you can’t be with yourself and be ok thats a bad sign

6. I don’t really, but as much as it hurts I feel like it’s still for the best.

7. I’ve come to appreciate being on your own. There’s more freedom and you don’t have to explain yourself. Lots of sex and it’s cheaper so what’s the point of being in a relationship anyway, why risk getting your heart crushed.

8. A lot of failed relationships have made it not worth the effort to try again

9. Massive amount of child support and legal bills. They make sure I have no time to date or even think about it.

10. Take all that energy and time you now have spare and work on yourself. You are your next big project, and you will love it.

    Work out, read, learn to cook, keep contact with your old friend group, make new friendships… Whatever makes you fullfilled and fills your brain without instant gratification.

    I am 2 years single, and on the highest moment of my life. If we always repeat the same mantra it is bc it works.

11. I wouldn’t trade my FREEDOM, no matter how beautiful or compatible that person is

12. You feel like you want company and share experiences, this feeling will not go away (it’s at it worst a few months after a breakup).

    You also know what the cost of being in a relationship is.

    So ask yourself if you’re willing to pay the price and act accordingly.

13. Never having to ask permission to do anything.
    Never having to go places I don’t want to be
    Never having to spend time with people I don’t want to see
    Sacrifice is sex, worth it.

14. You don’t. You just get used to it.

    Think of ‘love’ like a powerful drug. When you’re with someone, you’re getting a constant hit of all the feel-good hormones. It makes you happy, it levels your mood, you feel more relaxed, you don’t get angry, etc. When you break up, or get dumped, what you’re really doing is quitting the drug cold turkey. That’s why your mood crashes. Your brain wants the drugs, but you no longer have access to your dealer, so you have all the side-effects of withdrawal. Irritable, sad, difficulty modulating your emotions. Your brain starts coming up with excuses to get that hit – maybe I’ll just say hi. Or, it’s a special occasion, maybe if I drop them a line it’ll cheer me up. Maybe just one peek at their social media.

    But, eventually, just like all addictions, your neurochemistry levels out and you get back to some sort of baseline. Maybe lower than it was when you were in a relationship, but it levels off, and that becomes your new normal. Eventually your conscious mind and body adapts to doing without the drug, and, in 6 or 12 months, you get used to being alone and doing without touch. And you’re okay. Or, if not exactly ‘okay’, doing without love or touch won’t kill you. Or if it will, it’s in no special hurry to do so.

    The real danger is when you meet someone else. Your body suddenly remembers what it’s been missing, and that hit is like an addict falling off the wagon for the first time in years. You get this huge rush of chemicals and feel-good hormones, and your body snaps right back to where you were at the start of your last relationship, which starts the whole cycle again.

15. Never been in relationships. Never pursued any and I think I am better for it. Not a person who could do well in relationships.

    So, how am I doing? I think better then if I was in one.

16. I prefer having a partner.

    Life is hard by yourself but easier with someone else.

    Plus, dual income will accomplish goals easier.

17. I sought relationships outside the culture. Western culture is garbage, feminism ruined women and destroyed relationships and the family. Marry a woman from a culture that’s not poisoned by it, e.g. Latino, Eastern European, Arab, African, Asian etc. Women there love men, cherish their femininity and respect their homes and families.

18. Who says I’m okay with it?