There’s this girl (21 F) that I (21 M) haven’t known for long now but whenever we talk it’s usually us joking and teasing one another. When we’re joking and teasing she gets physical sometimes. She’s told me a few times that she “knows I have a crush on her”. What would be the best way to react and to reply next time she says this? I honestly do not know what she truly means by saying this to me out of the blue. Should I address the matter? Thanks for your advice!
19 comments
Do you have a crush on her?
Well… Do you have a crush on her?
If so, this is a green light.
It sounds like she instead has a crush on you and is trying to get you to admit you have one too. If you do, ask her out, sounds like you have the greenest light ever. If not, you better let her know so because she is being very agressive to the point of being physical.
Oh look, an overhead projector. She’s projecting and it goes – whoosh – right over your head.
Let’s take this back to grade school. A girl in your class, punching you.
Yep, that young girl doesn’t know how to tell you she likes you, so she hits you.
Now, 15 years later, the same, but verbal.
Lmfao this girl has a crush on you. That’s what she’s saying. She wants you to make the first move. In fact she’s already made a move but by trying to say that you have a crush on her when in reality she has a crush on you, she’s making sure that she isn’t actually making the first room but leaving it open to you making a move if you feel like it. You’re just oblivious. Hahaha
Well do you?
Shes into you and hoping u will make the move.
First decide whether you want to have a romantic relationship with her as this will decide whether you let her down or lead her on.
If you want to ket her down nicely: “Are you saying that because *you* have a crush on *me*, because I’m sorry but I don’t feel that way”
If you want to be harsh so that she drops it “that’s so creepy for you to keep saying that”
If you want a neutral response that leaves the option of romance open “are you flirting with me?” (smile)
She’s trying to feed her own ego, so what I would do is really go overboard on how bad you feel to have to let her down about you not being interested, and really lay it on about you’re sure someone out there will be interested in her one day if she keeps her chin up. Like really make it sound like you feel soooo bad for her because she’s so desperate for you to be into her, but in a way which makes it sound like you’re trying to be nice. Maybe even give her tips about what guys like for the next time she has a crush, so she has a chance with them. It will shut her up, and maybe bring her ego down a couple of notches so she doesn’t do this to other people.
The fact that she gets physical in her flirtation makes it sound to me like she’s using that as a verbal invitation. Does she say it specifically while getting physical with you?
You don’t have to have a crush on her to be attracted to her. Are you attracted? Then you can get closer. If you’re _not_ attracted to her, probably better dial it back some, so as to not lead her on.
Well…do you?
A few of these comments are perplexing. There are people who just tease each other when they are friends. They aren’t egomaniacs. I think it’s somewhat possible she wants something more. But if that’s not what you want there are a few options. What do you want to convey?
Depends…. Do you have a crush on her or not? Because that makes a huge difference in the type of advice I impulsively want to throw out.
It means she probably has a crush on you & this is a safe way for her to test the waters. If you feel the same way, tell her yes then ask her out on a date. If you don’t then go along with laughing it off.
You nerd, she wants to touch your pp. *Do* you have a crush on her??
She sounds toxic OP. Time to ghost her.
/s
She’s trying to put the idea in your head to see if you like her that way.
ok I am a grown woman. -and I have seen in the past and present and know of these behaviors, in girls and young women.
So she jokes and gets physical and says she: “knows I have a crush on her”
and you want to know what this means. I think it means that she is into you and is sending signals that if you make a move on her she would be into it. She is doing it that way because if you are not into her like that and do nothing then her self-esteem is preserved.
so
“What would be the best way to react and to reply next time she says this?”
Well, if you are interested in her – make a move
if you are not interested in her like that – you could pretend to be oblivious – and just keep doing what you are doing now with her when she says that kind of ignoring the statement or moving on to a different topic. Or you could tell her that you don’t have a crush on her. Honestly, after a while, if you don’t make a move to escalate the relationship to a romantic one – she will move on. And I bet she is off somewhere currently asking her friends if they think you like her and what should she do and what does it mean when I say this and he responses like that?