I 22F met a guy about 4 years ago. His family are old family friends but we had never met until then. He had expressed his interest in me almost immediately and I started to warm up to the idea as I got to know him more. He’s a great guy! But we never dated. Why? Well at the time, I felt that he was too young for me. He’s exactly 2 years younger and to my 18 year old brain back then, I thought that was gross. (I realize my stupidity now) We went out separate ways and eventually lost contact.
Now, 4 years later, he is back and will be staying with one of my relatives. So, I would be seeing him pretty often. Based on the few times we’ve spoken and how he stares at me from across the room, he seems to still like me. Here’s the issue. I started exclusively dating someone 2 months ago. He is simply amazing and we are so compatible that it’s kinda creepy as if someone specially designed him for me. He is kind and sweet and an overall great person. I’m falling for him hard.
With this other guy coming back, I am starting to feel bad. Looking at him brings back all the feelings from back then. You can cut the tension with a knife. I catch myself randomly thinking about him or waiting for him to text me. If I see him with another girl, it annoys me. And the girls are really swarming (he’s hot)
I feel horrible. I never imagined that I would be in this situation. I don’t know what to do. I can’t stop myself from thinking “what if?”. Especially because my current relationship is still very new.
Please I need a reality check. I might be overthinking things.
5 comments
Well, even when you’re with someone having crushes can happen, whether you act on that or not is up to you.
Either break up with who you’re with and gamble on that guy, or put some distance between you and him until you get over whatever feelings you have.
Nah you definitely need to cut these feelings one way or another.
If I was your Bf this would’ve already crossed my line. Why do you care if other girls show interest in him. It sounds like you are ready to cheat but your morality is holding you back.
I’m not trying to demonize you but I feel bad for your bf if this keeps up.
Stop it !
Sounds like your current bf isn’t as great as you’re saying he is. You basically stated that you are nearly willing to cheat on him. Old flame or not, ive never considered cheating on any of my “great” partners. It isn’t fair to him either whether he knows or not. Break up with him, he honestly deserves better than someone who’s probably gonna cheat on him if this other dude hits her up
Please don’t cheat on your bf. It really hurts, and I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.
In the game of life integrity matters. Once you’ve made your choice about something public, your reputation depends on being faithful to it. It’s about how far you will go to honor your word, and that signals how trustworthy you are.
It’s okay to have feelings for people other than your significant other…that’s completely natural. However, if you want to act on those feelings, it’s fairer on your S.O. to break up before you do any cheating. That way, you get to own the consequences of that relationship not working out just like any other adult would. You can give up something good for potentially something great, and you might be right. However, if it ends up being bad, would it be fair for the good option to just wait around knowing they’re not your best option?
Break up with ur current guy and go do what u want.