What exactly does an average date look like, and what are the unwritten rules?

8 comments

1. No hard rules about this but if its off the apps first dates are meet and greets in public places.

   I’d plan for them to be around 30 minutes but if you two really hit it off you might be there for a few hours. It all depends.

   Just be on time and be friendly and chill. Chat about what you are looking for and find out what they want and try and have some fun.

2. Swallowing is not mandatory on the 1st date, but is seen as good form. Other than that, just be yourself.

3. An average date? It ends with goodbyes. Then trails off to less and less texting over a relatively short time until you don’t talk anymore.

   Exceptional dates end in relationships.

4. [deleted]

5. Always put the money on the dresser first.

6. It’s not rocket science.

7. You should both try to look like your in your best casual clothes and if you spend money, be careful she isnt using you, many girls only “date” to have a free night out.

   Make sure you have a guaranteed way home in case they decide to leave you.

   You should do something casual in a public place for the first date, like meeting at a coffee shop! That way they have less ability to be crazy without people coming to your aid.

   A great idea for an easy compass toward the right girls is to try taking them to a buffet. You can tell alot about a girl based on how they act during that date. If they eat and try chat and make sure your both having a good time, shes a good girl.

   But if she focuses on food over you, doesnt want to talk, refuses eyecontact and is constantly focusing on getting her plate filled fast- shes not there to see you.

   This works like a charm and has helped me filter out the girls who faked interest for free food or free day out

   Other things..

   Only keep enough money for a casual date and some hidden emergency cash in case it goes bad.

   I know I sound like Im prepping for impending doom- but Ive met plenty of girls that tried coaxing me into a white van, their husband showed up or the girl trapped my ass at a unexpected three-way. Some girls believe its okay to do anything to guys and men should be greatful for even being included.

8. It’s going to vary tremendously from person to person. Assuming we’re talking about new/newer partners and not established relationships, there’s likely to be a degree of difference there too.

   At least for me, at the point I’m going on a date with someone, we’ve talked enough that I’m confident I’ll enjoy several hours of being together, or I wouldn’t be going on the date in the first place.

   I’m happy to have a more casual not-quite-date with someone to do the meeting in-person/chat over coffee or whatever that’s shorter, but if we’re going on a real date, even the first one, I’m generally thinking we’ll spend several hours together.

   As for unwritten rules, IMO, the biggest one is that you should show up prepared to pay for yourself unless an explicit offer of the other person paying has been made (or some other obvious context clue that they’re buying dinner, for instance). That, and for better or worse, it’s good to have someone else know what you’re up to for the day/afternoon/evening/whatever that you can check in with when it’s over in case something untoward happens.