My wife told me she wants me to treat her like a slut/hoe in bed. We’ve been together nearly 15 years and have been trying to get more creative. What can I do (in a same sex relationship) to give her what she wants.

24 comments
  1. I think one of the best things is to start fantasizing together. So sit down and talk about sex and talk about “would it be hot if …?” “oh yeah I’m really into …” etc.

    Acknowledge there’ll be some stuff that one of you is into and the other isn’t, that’s fine, what you’re looking for is the stuff that you both really like.

    And yeah this helps you learn each others boundaries so you can know how much is too much and when to stop.

    It helps you really understand what “treated like a slut” really means to her … which will be completely different from what it means for everyone else. (For instance some people love getting fucked, other people love being denied pleasure, it’s completely the opposite.)

    It’s also just a really fun activity in general which feels great and can be super arousing. And it’s incredibly low risk which is awesome (some BDSM stuff has significant risks attached).

    So yeah just really deeply talking is one of the best things.

  2. Grease up her entire body with oil and go to town with some toys. Maybe add a couple of slaps to the face and some dirty talk. Could make for a nice night together.

  3. Also a WLW. Dirty talk is your friend here. It doesn’t have to be degrading either. I’m not a fan of degrading talk but my girlfriend still gets the message across. You can also try some bondage if you’re both comfortable with that.

  4. I find it just so, so hot when my wife wears the shortest little miniskirts (I mean, so short, she’d never wear em out in public), so I asked her to put one on sometimes to initiate sex with me or let me know she’s frisky… beyond our more usual sex sessions. If you or your wife have a kink about a certain sort of promiscuous looking clothing like short miniskirts or midriff tank tops or leather skirts or pants or whatever, she could wear one during foreplay and you could comment about how sexy or even slutty it is… within whatever is verbally comfortable for you to say to her. I’ve said this miniskirts kink before on this sub, but dang it’s hot. My wife just likes hearing me say how totally sexy she looks, but language could be modified in others’ case to say slutty or hoe-ish. My wife got a couple other super short denim miniskirts (like her butt shows from behind, — so hot) and stuff online and we just have fun with it. Such an extra turn-on. All the best.

  5. Order her around. Tell her to get on her knees. Smack her in the face with your dick. Doesn’t have to be hard if she doesn’t like rough stuff. Even lighter tapping asserts a kind of dominance. Tell her you are ready to be pleasured and she better do a good job. Manhandle her like a doll, moving her into different positions. There’s all kinds of dirty talk, can say dirty little slut, or pretty little slut, or such a good little slut. Personally I love both praise and light degradation.

    Don’t forget the aftercare.

  6. Been in a similar situation a few years ago. It took some self-conditioning and time to go from being a gentle person to a “beast”. Now, that side of me can be switched on instantly. Sit down together, define your boundaries, and let it evolve from there.

  7. I would first ensure she was moist or applied lubricant to myself to prevent injury and pain. Then have sex with her hard. I mean, do it like hate sex. get rough with her, spank her butt, maybe slam your genitals across her face.

    I know these actions seem hateful, but if done in moderation with what she wants, it could fulfill her need as a submissive. The bottom line you all need to have a heart to heart talk. What are her limits, what are yours. What does she want, how does she want it, etc…and you be honest as well. Communication is the answer to your problem.

  8. Slut can be applied to a wide range of sexual behaviors. Generally it means being both eager and available sexually, but there are a *ton of aspects* involved in this dynamic that might specifically appeal to your wife. Until you know what about being slutty she’s primarily turned on by you won’t be able to provide it consistently.

  9. I say if you have the opportunity to just randomly bend her over and fuck her, go for it. Unless she’s not into that then don’t obviously.

  10. If there’s something you would like do do with a stripper, or prostitute that you wouldn’t normally do with your wife try bringing that up to try out

  11. What does slut mean to her? To me I do not mind being called a slut because it just means someone who loves sex a lot. It doesn’t have to mean someone who loves sex so much she will hookup with anyone to get it.

    If she just wants you to have more sex with her, then you have it made – hopefully you have the same appetite.

    Try to ask her what she has in mind so you can play along and have fun with it.

  12. She’s telling you she wants to spice things up in the bedroom. Nothing wrong with that it would be good for both of you. After 15 years together that should be easy for you to do

  13. And for a typically male asshole type of trying to be funny comment i would say go and buy 10 different dildos and use them all on her in one session like a slut!! Maybe she might find the joke funny too

  14. Maybe look into BDSM. It’s not nearly as scary as media makes it out to be (though avoid 50 Shades of cringe at all costs). r/bdsmcommunity might be able to give you some good advice. Also, aftercare is vital for *both* of you. Being degraded can be fun, but it’s important to remind her after that she’s not *actually* the mean things you’ve called her. It’s also important that she reminds *you* that she appreciated what you’ve done for her and that she still sees you as the sweet spouse that you are.

  15. What does women loving women have to do with her wanting you to treat her like a slut? I don’t get it

  16. I’m in a same sex relationship as well. One thing we love to do is role play. Role play is more fun when it starts outside of the bedroom. So we will play our parts all day long, we met up at a restaurant and acted like we just met each other. I asked her to come back to my apartment (our apartment) and she played her role as a slut. The key to fulfill that fantasy is the things you say. When she went down on me I said things like “your such a fucking slut I love it,” I would rock against her mouth and say “I love fucking that pretty little face” or “I know you love doing this don’t you,” the key is to get into her head.

  17. When I want to be treated like a slut, the biggest turn on for me is someone just going for it. Don’t ask me what position you’re going to fuck me in – tell me. Don’t ask me if I like it – tell me you don’t care if I like it or not.

    Buy her something sexy and demand she wears it for you.

    I also love being told by my partner that he wants to see me being fucked by someone else. And if you’re feeling up for it, there’s no better and safer way to feel like a slut than a good swingers club.

    Obviously it takes a lot of trust and you need to be able to read the other person super well. But when it works, it really works

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