I am insecure and seek validation from others.

3 comments

1. Having done this quite a bit throughout development, one thing that finally helped me put this habit to rest is getting into philosophy and realizing how futile it is to look for your own salvation in others who are also complex changing creatures with their own insecurities and misevaluations at various stages of self development too… being human isn’t very straightforward. Look up stoic quotes on youtube for a brief introduction. Don’t doubt your value and find comfort in yourself to better handle interacting with anyone. Everyone has their own issues so it is good that you are focusing on finding a way to validate yourself.

2. Ask yourself something honestly. Why do you need constant validation from people ? You are essentially the emperor without clothes. You expect people to keep respecting you when there is actually nothing to respect about you. You don’t even respect yourself. You know this, and others know it as well. But All you do is worry about other people instead of worrying about important things in your life. You know what it takes to get better in your life, but instead of putting in the time and effort to do so, you need other people to essentially keep lying to you. In short, you need people to keep telling you comforting lies rather than dealing with the uncomfortable realities. This is your mindset when you seek validation.

3. Saying positive things will be a temporary fix. You need to do positive things. Find activities you like to do because you want to (very important) and as you progress thru it you’ll feel happy, content, a sense of accomplishment and it will build your confidence. As this starts happening you’ll be much more comfortable in your own skin without the need for anyone to validate what you do because you have that internal sense of accomplishment