What do you think are the most important qualities of a good parent?

23 comments

1. Good listening skills. Dependability.

2. support, allow your children to explore THEIR DREAMS (not your own), unconditional love, words of affirmation.

3. Humility.

   Why? Because parenting is something you do for 20+ years, and if you’re not humble enough to learn from your mistakes and admit when you’re wrong, you’ll have toddler-level parenting skills when your kids are teenagers.

4. Patience

5. I think a good parent teaches children how to be an adult. This means teaching children to be self sufficient and independent from the time they’re infants.

   I’ve watched parents put their baby on the floor and within 20 seconds the baby cries and mom picks them back up. Babies can be uncomfortable for 5 minutes on their tummy. They will not die, I promise, and they’ll be stronger for it.

6. emotional intelligence

7. The ability to listen to your child no matter what age and be a level responsive parent, not a reactive one. The parent that helps their kids express their feelings so they don’t become people pleasing emotionally incapacitated adults.

8. Self-awareness. Parenting is tough. Nobody is perfect. It’s very, very easy to lose perspective when you’re running around crazy trying to “super mom” from sunrise to sunset.

   In order to be a good parent, you have to take care of yourself holistically and understand your strengths and weaknesses. You have to be able to set reasonable expectations for yourself and actionable plans to reach them. You have to be able to separate ego or emotion from decisions and situations that require rationality and calm. In the hurricane that is the domestic thunderdome, you must be the eye.

   Just having self-awareness won’t magically make someone into a good parent, obviously, but I think most would struggle to find a good parent who wasn’t self-aware.

9. Patience, creativity, commitment, communication, self-sacrifice

10. Patience and acceptance

11. Being present, being supportive, being concerned and careful, but not too much, and just trying your best.

    I know I definitely felt it when my parents stopped trying. I’ll never do that to my son.

12. Present and loving

13. I’m not a parent myself, but one thing about my parents that really stands out is their dedication. Trying to go to as many games and performances as possible (no matter how annoying it was), making birthdays and holidays extra special, engaging in whatever interests us means volumes to my siblings and I. Sometimes they mess up, because they are human too, but at the end of the day they really have shown just how much they care about us.

14. Compassion. Children are human, not perfect.

15. Willingness to learn from your mistakes and to apologize to your children when you are at fault.

16. Kiss there head and spank their ass

    Don’t get mushy on them, remind them the world is harsh and there are consequences! But don’t be some strict asshole all the time, reward good behavior and remind them they can ask for help

17. Having compassion and understanding where you’re child is coming from. Don’t be the enemy but be a supporting character in their life

18. Lots of good things here but I’ll add the ability to let things go. Let go of your expectations, your children are their own people. Let go of how hard you are on yourself, you can only do your best. Let go of all the biased opinions everyone else has about how to raise your kid, you know them better than anyone else. Let go of the bad days, there will be a few. Let go of the expectation that everything has to be perfect. Parents these days are up against so much. Between screen time, schooling, covid, ect. You just have to trust your gut. Verify with the latest science of course, but your instincts are there for a very good reason.

19. Empathy and humility.

    Understand that your kids’ experiences are different than yours, and that they may not go through the same challenges, but their struggles and feelings are still just as strong. Being able to admit that you made a mistake or were wrong shows more strength than pretending that you’re perfect, because no one is.

20. An involved parent. One who listens and doesn’t try to mold me to what they want. Good communication, honesty and openness

21. Being open-minded and having the trust in their children

22. Having your shit together.

    Spending time with your kids.

    Providing structure without being a tyrant.

23. Open minds. Honesty. Support. Unconditional Love.
    Say ‘yes’.
    One more ride down the slide? Sure. Wants one more push even though we’re late? Sure. They want to stop and look at a few things? Sure. They want to do really anything than it’s a ‘yes’. There will be a day where they stop asking. Where I know it will be me who wants them to go down that slide one more time, that wants that goodnight tuck in, that bedtime story, that midafternoon snuggle. So say ‘yes’ whenever you can, even if it makes you a little late or doesn’t fit within your plan for the day.
    I also live by the motto of ‘If it’s not immoral, illegal, harming themselves or others, or permanent than let them do it.’ – this has created a lot of trust between myself and my kids and they have to think things through before making decisions. They know that 99.99% of the time that going through this ‘checklist’ will help them determine if they should do something.