So, I’ll be brief. I’m a Hispanic that moved to the US one year ago; I learned English in my country of origin so I have this Hispanic accent.
I feel ashamed of talking to people in English specially because I’ve seen a lot of Hispanics (born in US) with native accent obviously. This feeling is not letting me make friends or ask girls out. I feel specially afraid of talking to girls. I’ve made some friends because they’ve talked to me but there have been few people that have just tried to avoid me when I try to make a conversation and I’ve seen their facial expressions like “wtf” when I speak.
How do I overcome this?
What would girls probably think about my accent?
23 comments
If you speak confidently despite the heavy accent, you might still make a good conversation as a speaker with an “exotic accent”
I have an Irish accent, and I have sometimes found that unfamiliar accents are difficult for people to pick up. When I spoke at a slower pace, they understood what I was saying. You may find that your accent is very attractive! So take it easy. Accents add to the flavour of life.
I don’t hear so well so accents can be tough if the person is speaking fast or has a low-tone. That being said, people can be lame with their biases. Best not to take it personally. They are weak, not you. Try to never become opinionated like them.
That is a fault on them and not you. The ability to speak a 2nd language is commendable, and their ignorance is a definite red flag. I’m sorry you have to deal with this, but Im sure if you “keep our chin up” and keep at it, you will find what you are looking for, good people are out there
I love speaking with people who have accents. Neighbor is Italian, landlord is Hispanic, I work with Germans, Italians and Hispanics. Yes, sometimes I have a hard time understanding, but what would I sound like attempting either of those languages?
I understand the accent angst. But an accent can be quite stimulating for some women. I guarantee it. 😉
Your accent is what makes you unique. Don’t ever change it. You can try improve your grammar and vocabulary but your accent is part of your identity. Also, women love good accents. They are super sexy. Embrace it. That will make you more confident as well.
In the US there is a lot of people speaking with different accents because how much cultural variety there is. So i wouldn’t be ashamed, and actually its what makes a culture interesting. Anyone who doesn’t like that, its someone worth having as an
acquaintance and nothing else.
Actually, its far more common, to be ashamed by your second language with people that also speaks your first language as their first too.
Accents are wonderful! I travel everywhere and I meet people from all over and I don’t think I’ve ever heard an accent that I didn’t care for. You’re fine, i know it. You just need to build confidence about it.
Please don’t feel ashamed. Just think that you are better than 90% of Americans who only can speak one language. Be proud.
As someone who can only speak one language and is in the process of learning another, I have enormous respect for anyone who can speak more than one language. People who would judge you for your accent would judge you for other parts of who you fundamentally are – you don’t want to be their friend. If your accent is very strong it’s possible they may not understand what you are saying. But if you speak slowly and are ok with repeating yourself and they put in a bit of effort then it should be fine
When people speak to me in a different accent I just think they are smarter than me for knowing at least two languages!
My mom, dad and aunts speak English with strong Spanish accents despite living here for 30 years. They’ve made lots of friends that only speak English. Those that care about your accent don’t matter, they’re probably racist. I personally like the Spanish accents, I think their charming. Although I do find it weird and funny when I hear people pronounce Walmart as “Gualmart”. Don’t be self conscious about your heritage showing through, it’s a part of you. It’s easier to make friends with people of similar background or similar lifestyles
when I was younger I wished I had an accent to pull women
I live near the border, and deal with a lot of native Spanish speakers with thick accents all of the time. Feel proud that you learned a second language! That’s impressive. I don’t know anyone who is bothered by the accent.
Accents are so beautiful! The people avoiding you are stupid racists
I can’t help but wonder which part of the US you’re in or whether it’s a city or a rural area. Near a college? These things might affect people’s initial reactions. Regardless though, you’re doing an awesome job. My attempts to learn Spanish have not resulted in any conversational ability. Even the basics of Spanish conversation sound confusing when people speak at their natural speed. So give yourself props (proper respect) for getting as far as you have and if anyone makes you feel small or treats you unkindly for it, know that it’s a problem in them and not you. Move on and try again. Be open that you’re new to the language and ask people to speak slowly if needed and if they’re worth knowing, they will make an effort. You might even find someone who thinks your accent is attractive. Believe in yourself 😊
I know it’s probably hard to put yourself out there but it’ll honestly help to weed out girls who would probably be a bad fit anyway.
So I am a happily married lady, but I know a lot of women find accents very attractive. The biggest thing is confidence still and be prepared for some language mistakes and don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed or anything if you do. Just keep it cool and you’ll be fine!
There is a term for this. It is called “internalised racism” in America right now there is a lot of negative comments about people from south America. So part of this may be that you have taken on that negativity. Having learned English as a second language, you have nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, as an American who only speaks one language, and has trouble making himself understood at times, I am very proud of you. You are doing something I couldn’t.
As for women. Remember that the most stereotypical romantic man is the “Latin lover” I am sure you will find women who think “oh my gawd, I can’t understand a ward he says” but you will also find women who are thinking “oh my, his accent is so sexy, I’m getting wet listening to him order breakfast, let’s skip food and go back to my place, where he can read to me from the phone book”
If, however, you want to change this, if you have money, then you can pay a vocal coach. They are the people who teach actors to either not have the accent they were born with, or to develop an accent for a role other than their original language.
If you can’t afford this, I would suggest that you join toastmasters. This will help you to learn how to speak more slowly, add more pauses to allow you listener to catch up, and, over time, your accent may reduce.
I love this thread
I worry people think I’m judgmental in someway when it’s only that I’m trying to understand. 99% of the time the issue is that the person speaks too softly for me to hear and comprehend. They usually think it’s the accent but it is not.
Also there absolutely are shitty people you’ll come, but the majority of people I know are rude by mistake and not doing it intentionally.
You’re just talking with the wrong people… im asian and i have a thick accent too…:) and its normal nothing’s arong with that… We’re supernatural. We know 2 or more langauges… you shouldn’t be ahsamed you’re not alone.. if they judge you for the way you speak then the problem is them… never limit yourself just because language barier is stoping you. As long as you. Can express yourself in English and other languages. You’re gooooood.💖✨✨
Hi, linguistics student here! 👋
I can only tell you so much, but I believe that an accent is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Think of it this way: An accent just shows that you have a heritage somewhere else, that you made an effort to learn another language (and did it well for that matter) and that is just so much nicer than the blandness of always blending in and being the same as everyone else.
Your accent will mellow out over time as you spend more time with English speakers, but do keep in mind, that it makes you unique, it is your own personal idiolect (The parts of you and your environment that make up the way you speak). So all I can say is – Rock that accent! Proudly!
And if someone gives you “the wtf look” then they would have judged you either way and probably aren’t the right person to befriend either way. Go get it!