My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 months. He’s my first ever boyfriend and I love him so much, but I’ve messed up already. It’s not like I’ve cheated, but he has compared what I did to cheating. Before we got into a relationship, he told me something and I thought nothing of it really. I told my best friend at the time because I told her everything. A few days later, she ended up dropping me. I continue talking to my now boyfriend, and we start getting closer. I told 4 of my other friends this something he told me. We got together around this time.
However it wasn’t until after I told them that he told me it’s something he doesn’t want anyone knowing, and if I told anyone he’d be really upset. He compared it to cheating. I told him I told 2 of my friends. He asked if I told anyone else and I said I didn’t. I don’t know why I only told him I told 2 of them or lied about telling more people. I should’ve been honest with him but I thought he was going to break up with me if I told him. 3 months later I still haven’t told him. I feel bad but I really don’t want him to break up with me.
The two friends that I told him I shared it with said not to tell him who I’ve told but they’re some toxic people. After listening to how their relationships are going I realize I should not have listened to them. I also don’t know how to bring it up because it’s either we’re having a really good moment together or there’s something going on with him which made him upset and I don’t want to upset him further. I know it’s 3 months into the relationship and I’ve done something already and I need to tell him. But I really don’t know how to bring it up with him or when to. I feel bad but I feel selfish for feeling bad because I brought this upon myself. I really don’t know what to do.
tl;dr : I lied to my boyfriend about telling someone something thats sensitive to him and I don’t know how to go about telling him at the right time
1 comment
If you’re waiting for the “perfect moment,” you’ll never tell him.
You’re just going to have to spit it out. Gather your courage, and once he’s got some free time and he’s not on his way to do something else, tell him you have something to confess – you didn’t just tell two people, you told five. You didn’t know at the time that he didn’t want this information shared, and you panicked when told you this was a secret and he asked how many people knew. You’re sorry for lying in the moment, and you’re sorry for waiting so long to tell him the truth. You’re ready to give him some space if he needs it, and you’re ready to work to earn back his trust if he’s willing to try.