This evening, while casually playing game together, my boyfriend drank a 6 pack of 7.1 ABV IPAs in under three hours. He’s now stumbling around the house and can’t even walk straight. It’s so ridiculous that he gets so drunk and it makes me not want to be around or near him. He sounds silly and incomprehensible, it’s like adult babysitting. I’m so frustrated and don’t know what to do because while this doesn’t happen often I feel like it’s happened enough for me to be over it
17 comments
Yet you still suck him off smh
You gotta break up with him. I’m sorry it’s the only way.
If it makes you not want to be around or near him, then don’t be.
Follow your guy and be officially over it
Either leave him or imagine the kind of future you two would have together…he’s only going to get worse.
I’ve dealt with that with my partner for over 10 years. It doesn’t get better. I’m to a point where I hate his drinking more than I love him and that’s serious considering I’m madly in love with him.
I literally told him the other night that the fact that he’s a man that cannot go a day without consuming liquor and beer is such a turn off. It makes him look weak. And the fact that he’s almost 40 and still hasn’t learned his limit is ridiculous. So off putting.
I mean if he’s not an alcoholic…why don’t you just talk to him about it? “Hey it bothers me when you binge drink. I feel like I have to babysit you and it is stressful and not enjoyable for me.
Would you consider cutting down your drinking when you are around me?”
have you talked to him about it? i dated an active alcoholic and i’m married to an 8 years sober one, so i know it’s a fucking nightmare and deeply unattractive. if he’s not an alcoholic, he ought to be able to simply stop.
Tonight I caught a whiff of something that smells like you know that smell when someone get wasted and they wake up the next morning and you can still smell that they are drunk? I had a boyfriend, my very first serious boyfriend, and he was an alcoholic and a bad one and and that smell which I never smell anymore just instantly brought me back like 30 years to that awful feeling and the bad memories so I understand how over you must be. It is so awful.
We broke up because I learned at a very young age because I was 16 that you can’t make somebody quit drinking and the only quit if they want to and that I had to value myself and ask the hard questions of myself and we broke up obviously and I learned a lot then. So I feel your pain I do.
Have a talk with him and let him know that you are bothered by it… if it happens again… be on the lookout
If it has happened enough for you to be over it, then you’re over it. I dated a guy for a couple of years once, largely long distance, who I realized after moving closer to was a high functioning alcoholic. He didn’t drive so never got in trouble there. But I would find him passed out in his room in the afternoon after drinking half the day. He always smelled like alcohol. We couldn’t do anything without drinking being involved. I tried to bring it up to him and he got super defensive and so we ended up just breaking up. It just sounds like it is not something you are going to be able to be ok with, and that’s more than ok.
He’s either an alcoholic or in training to become one.
Moderate drinking for a guy is two drinks per day, per the CDC.
If he can’t stick with that, then say goodbye. Life with a drunk is guaranteed hell.
I dont drink and the term you used “adult babysitting” is EXACTLY how i feel when im around drunk people misbehaving. It is a major turn off.
Two beers an hour is not a lot
So he gets drunk once in awhile? Just talk to him about it. Reddit is really weird about alcohol, you’re going to get a lot of reactionary calling him an alcoholic and telling you to dump him, but in real life almost everyone who partakes in intoxicants overdoes it once in a blue moon.
It’s not a big deal. You can request he limits his drinking around you but I really wouldn’t berate him over this. He can drink in his own home.
You can have the talk and change your behavior and availability to him… leave. If you keep on being there and taking care, he won’t have a reason to change … besides the aftermath which is made better – most likely by your presence and support.
is he an alcoholic? if no, then sit him down when he is sober. Explain to him how he behaves and how it makes you feel like you’re babysitting an adult.
Depending on how he reacts you might want to reconsider the relationship. if he is apologetic and stops drinking so much, then see that as a sign that he is willing to compromize for the relationship.
if he is denying his behaviour and minimizing your feelings, then see it as a red flag.