first kiss heeeeelp

10 comments

1. If you are nervous about the kiss, you should wait more before having sex… One step at a time. About the kiss, relax your body, your lips and try to do what he’s doing.

2. Just relax and go with the flow.

   Maybe watch what you eat before you kiss. Some people object to bad breath. Depends on the person you’re kissing.

3. Embrace the awkward!

   My first kiss with my now wife was super awkward. Just objectively bad. We joke about it now and kiss plenty of times.

   Sex was the same. We were both virgins figuring it out as we went along. Be okay with laughing about the oops and mistakes. A partner that will laugh with you through that is a fun partner to be with.

   Also just communicate throughout it all. If it doesn’t feel good, say so. If it does, also say so. Work together to find a healthy, pleasurable normal.

4. Look: if you’ve never kissed before, then odds are, your first few times, it’ll be awkward and you’ll probably be “bad” at it and *that’s ok*. Very few people are awesome kissers right out the gate but *all of us* can learn to become great kissers with time and patience.

   Also: do you want sex to happen or not? It’s hard to tell from your post.

5. if you are super nervous about kiss hold off on sex.

6. you don’t have to put your tongue in his mouth right away. i usually gently fit my bottom lip between his lips and kiss. If you want to slip your tongue in a little in between then do that. err on the side of being more gentle with it than trying to be really intense the first time. it’s easier to tell you might not know what you’re doing if you’re being too aggressive, whereas if you’re just too gentle he might just think you’re nervous, and you can always increase the pace once you’re comfortable. I only kissed the guy I’m now dating once before we had sex, and I was a virgin too. And tbh I was more nervous about the kiss than I was to have sex with him, so I completely relate to you on this. Also, don’t rule out just watching videos of people kiss. It might seem dumb but it could be helpful. Practice on your hand too! Seriously haha. Just try to make yourself feel as comfortable as possible, and try to be more excited than nervous. It’ll make him feel like you really want to be kissing him, instead of letting your nerves make it seem like you don’t want to be there (my nervousness has made me give off that vibe before)

7. First things first, get yourself to a point where you’re comfortable enough with someone that having a weird bodily thing happen (e.g., a sloppy kiss) isn’t awkward, but something you two can just laugh off. If you don’t have that level of comfort with someone, I don’t advise going forward with them.

8. I think you should try to treat it less like a performance that has to go well and more like getting to know each other and having fun with it. Applies for both kissing and sex.

9. Close your fucking eye Close your fucking mouth you can’t see if she regret you if you have eye Closed stupid

10. 19F, just had my first kiss a couple months ago. I felt similarly to you, I was so freaked out about being bad that I had to tell my boyfriend no a bunch of times before doing it finally. People always told me it would come naturally and it confused me and bothered me because I thought that it would never come naturally. Then… it happened, and trust me when I say it 100% will come naturally. Now, you may not be great your first time, and that is absolutely okay! The right person will understand, give you feedback, and is happy to practice as you figure things out. Heck, my boyfriend had to tell me a couple ways to change what I was doing the day we kissed for a first time. Now I’m a expert kisser, my bf says I’m excellent at it, and I feel so silly for worrying. It will be okay, and keep in mind it’s quick, it will be like 3-5 seconds and over before you know it. I told my boyfriend, it would be my first kiss to just clear up any expectations and that helped with some of my nerves. You could always try that.

    I really, 100% mean it when it comes naturally. You will know what to do. But if you like ahead of time, an actual explanation of different types of kisses, progressing from your first kiss to making out, I would be more than happy to do so. Basically how to kiss/techniques to try (but keep in mind people have preferences), I always wanted someone to tell me how to kiss and no one would explain it and it was irritating a little, so if you want a detailed explanation of how different possible kisses should work/can work, just respond to this comment with some questions if you would like. 🙂