Hi guys…I don’t really know how to start this post so I’m just going to get right into it. I’m 20F, unemployed, college student. I have what I’d consider severe social anxiety. Just a few examples of this would be being so shy to the point of not knowing how to have a conversation with someone, not being able to go to a party or a football game without having a panic attack and leaving after 10 minutes (even when I have my bf by my side), and even just going to the store or to class scares the hell out of me. I’ve had 2 jobs in my life; a janitor and a Walmart pickup associate. I loved my custodian job, but unfortunately had to move to go to college. And when I got the Walmart job after I moved here, I only lasted there for about 4 months because the stress and anxiety got to me. Even on my days off, I wouldn’t be able to relax because I would constantly think about my next shift. I’m to the point where I literally am so angry at myself for not being able to just be normal and not fear social interaction and crowded places. I’m so broke and have been looking for a job for months. But the only thing holding me back is that social anxiety. It’s not because I’m lazy (which is what everyone around me thinks), I’m just too embarrassed to tell anyone how bad my anxiety is out of fear of being called a pu**y. But when you have this eating away at you, it’s not something you can just turn off or get yourself to not think about. I am lost. I have no idea how to even get a job because I just know I can’t work with the public without having a panic attack and/or going home to cry everyday. I fear angry people, annoyed people, messing something up, and everything else under the sun. I need help or someone that is in the same boat as me because I can’t keep living like this. I want so badly to make friends (I literally have none) and to not fear doing daily things like going to school, the store, work, etc. I want a job where I can work behind the scenes and not have to talk to people every day, but I’ve had unfortunate luck in finding something like that with the qualifications I have. (Not to mention I also fear driving-maybe even more so than interacting with strangers). I’m just a hot mess and don’t know how to get over all of this. If anyone has suggestions for good jobs for me or ways to get over my fears, they’d be so appreciated.
Short: I have extreme social anxiety (and fear of driving) and can’t find a job that would allow me to work privately and individually with the qualifications I have. I haven’t told anyone the real reason I’ve been jobless for this long, and everyone assumes I’m just lazy, but I’m embarrassed to let anyone know the real reason is because I’m scared of people and social interaction. I need help and advice on finding a job I can work behind the scenes and how to get over my fears.
5 comments
I worked as a part-time librarian in college. Very little interaction when you’re putting books on shelves. There is some desk work, but exposure to some interaction is what’s needed to overcome social anxiety. Not much expectation when checking out books or answering questions.
Maybe a factory job if possible? It’s what I have, very little social interaction outside of what necessary (machine not working right etc.)
Have you tried getting on SSI?
What’s SSI?
Try the CCI social anxiety workbook. I think they’re very helpful if you can’t afford therapy.
You’ve got social anxiety because of things that have negatively affected you in the past. Be easy and compassionate to yourself and take small steps to deal with the social anxiety. This work will help you not just in getting a new job but in other aspects of life.