Title doesn’t sound like it’s a problem but I’m kinda insecure and need assurance about this.
Last night we were making out in bed. I ask him if I can give him a blowjob and he says yes. Keep in mind we’re both kinda new to this and I’ve only given a blowjob twice now.
I get down there but before I can do anything he stops me and says actually he doesn’t feel like having it in my mouth and if I could just use my hands. Also to come back up next to him.
I asked why and he said he’s tired which he knows mightn’t make a lot of sense but it’s just him and not to think about it.
To me it sounds like I’m bad at them and he doesn’t want to tell me. Like why does being tired make a difference when equal effort is put in on his end whether his dick is in my mouth or not.
21 comments
Maybe he realized his dick was a lil stinky and didn’t want your mouth on it
Only real way to know is ask him. Don’t blow it out of proportion- maybe he finishes faster with your hands or something. Maybe he just changed his mind. Could be anything. Don’t just immediately assume the worst.
This is something you need to talk to your bf about.
Sounds like he probably just got insecure for a bit and didn’t want your mouth down there. I wouldn’t read too much into this, just have a conversation about it
My bet is he was self concious about his hygiene, agreed in the moment but backed off.
OR looking at dates and lack of expirience you were both tipsy and he was afraid of teeth action.
He might have had gas and didn’t want to risk blasting one directly up your nostrils.
Sometimes you just are tired and don’t want to actually do anything, it happens and it doesn’t mean anything to your partner.
If you really want to know just ask him, dont be pushy to make this a thing, keep in mind that he already gave you a reason.
my dick is really sensitive & although i love my bf blowing me, i’m not always ready for a bj. it takes my body time to get ready for penile contact. maybe that’s his situation too
Dont jump right to negative conclusions. Maybe he wanted to kiss you or was gassy. Just dont read too much into it. If you are both inexperienced, enjoy learning together.
As a man, this sounds like he was self conscious or had some performance anxiety. It’s tricky to learn on both ends. Just keep communicating and it will work out
Ok so I’m a woman so this might not apply but…. Sometimes I prefer the intimacy of having my husband close to my face (kissing etc.) and would prefer that he use his hands rather than go down on me, even if oral might technically feel better or get me off faster. Possible it could have been something like that. Whatever his reason was, he didn’t want to stop all intimacy just wanted to do it differently. I wouldn’t fee self-conscious if I were you.
Maybe he just wanted you close to his body and able to hold you while you played with his dick?
You can also ask him.
Unless you bite down on it it’s unlikely that you are so bad that it is a problem to him. Like what most others say, just trust him and perhaps ask why a handjob is better when he is tired if you want to learn. But it might also be something he prefer not to talk about like becoming insecure or afraid of farting.
Personally I also just sometimes want my wife to be close to me because it’s intimate in different way when are faces are close and we can kiss.
Maybe the blowjob was toothy. Just ask him directly lol
I understand your insecurities, as you are young ans still learning a lot about everything.
But this sounds more like he had a problem on his side rather than yours. For example, feeling gassy and knowing you had your head down there.
Btw, men tend to agree that women are pretty bad usually for handjobs. We don’t have their genitalia, it’s not in the right orientation anyway, and we tend to hold it too tight/loose or do the movements in the wrong way (i discovered this apparent consensus by seeing it over and over on social media). So he clearly didn’t want to end your sexual contact, or he wouldn’t have asked for something that is harder to be good at than bj.
Have you considered asking him op?
Maybe it was toothy?
I like getting a hand job while kissing, that really turns me on, could be something like that, or maybe it what he’s used to?
Just tell him how ya feel, you guys will work it out
Yo as a guy whos with a guy I can provide some insight.
1) blowjobs are great but also if a guy jerks off a lot, it may not be enough to get him off
2) mix up your technique, you can even use hand on bottom mouth on top
3) sometimes a handjob feels better honestly
Theres not anything to be insecure about, he just communicated what he was feeling
Anyone else almost have an aneurysm trying to read mightn’t
He was stinky down there or you keep hurting him with your teeth
Communication is key. I see you have answers for a lot of the suggestions so if you think they might not be true then why not double check with him!