Hi first time posting here.
I’ve recently started checking my wife ‘s social media account, and I really feel uncomfortable with her contents.
Anyway, my wife is in her early 30s, and she is very beautiful and has an amazing body.
She’s been obsessed with workout for years, and train everyday very hard , and extremely fit.
Some years ago, she starred a modeling side job(mainly fitness modeling), and as all her model friends use it, she stated using Instagram as a way of promotion of her modeling job.
I didn’t really care about it at first, she was just posting her modeling photos basically,but I noticed she really cared about getting more followers which I thought was kinda dumb to care about in the first place. I had a minor discomfort imagining some guys were probably showing attention, and nothing more than that.
I didn’t really like the whole social media thing as I thought it was all vanity and fake, and I never use it myself.
Last month, I finally checked and went though her Instagram account, and it was full of selfies emphasizing her ass(she has an amazing ass), and a lot of workout clips filming from behind focusing /closing up on her ass, like 50% of contents are something like that .
Those selfies are sexy but well nothing too much maybe, but those ass workout clips? Some of them look too sexual.
I checked the comments. A lot of inappropriate comments as you can imagine. The worst one is taking about how a guy wanna put his thing in her pocket or smth(glad she didn’t reply to this), or just tons of comments how her 🍑 look nice etc. what makes me even more uncomfortable is that she “liked” or replied to those emoji compliments with “thank you “ with some stupid emoji etc, and some of those comments seem to be quite flirty to me.
I even saw some married guy praising her body, and she replied to that. I cannot imagine myself liking n commenting on some random girl’s sexual pic n getting a reaction from her. It seems so disrespectful to me. I
I was really shocked of all of these. Oh and she never posts pics of me or our kids on Instagram.
I talked to her about it, and she doesn’t seem to get why I care so much. She said she doesn’t care about her “simps” which is probably true, and only I can have her anyway.
She said she ignored all dms from horny guys, and when some guy asks her out, she tells them she is with somebody n not available. She always leaves her phone right in front of me, and I know her passcode, so I don’t think she is lying. she said I can check her phone if I want. I don’t check her phone as I don’t wanna act that insecure though.
She doesn’t post regularly, just like once per month, and it’s not a big deal. She posts stories regularly when we go out for a restaurant or smth, which is kinda annoying, but nth sexual.
I told her that her enjoying attentions from random guys is disrespectful, but she thinks I’m exaggerating. I also don’t like it that my male friend or some of my relatives can see her provocative pics/clips.
She also kinda blamed me for caring about it all of sudden after so many years. She said I didn’t car about her, I didn’t show her affection much, I didn’t say I love her even when she said it, I rejected her sexual advances many times n never initiated sex.
Those are all true. There are some other issues that made me resent her, and i had been pretty cold to her. I admit my fault, and I’m now trying not to be a sarcastic n jaded asshole even if there are some things I dont like about her.
Anyway she posted her yoga pants selfie with a rabbit filter again because it’s new year or smth and it really pissed me off, really made me feel uncomfortable even though the pa
She said it was for new year, and she won’t post again for a few months, so it’s not a big deal.
The irony is those guys comments kinda made me realize how hot she is, and kinda turned me on. My lust for her has come back, we are having sex a lot like everyday lately.
but I just hate the idea that love of my life are posting these content, and horny guys are seeing her like just another instathot, n she is actually showing her amazing body for them. I cannot stand it.
I understand that she’s tried so hard to obtain such an amazing body/figure, and she wanna show off the result, but
This is the girl I talked for so many hours about life, issues, our values etc everyday when I first got to know her, Literally everyday, n that’s how we fell in love.
Sorry m thoughts are all over, wand this post is pretty much an unedited mess.
TLDR) my wife who’s modeling posts sexy workout pics/clips on social media, and it’s bothering me.
11 comments
Saddest sentence in the whole post… “those guys comments kinda made me realize how hot she is”… that you didn’t appreciate her before, or treat her like she’s amazing to you or initiate intimacy before.
Not going to comment on her account, but am going to say it sounds like you took her for granted for a while.
She went and got the attention some people so desperately crave.
>she really cared about getting more followers which I thought was kinda dumb to care about in the first place.
When she’s literally using it for *promotion*? Getting more followers is pretty much entirely the point.
I’ve been going to a gym for the last 5 months.
I’ve noticed lots of women do this.
I added two of the gym trainers on IG, and now IG is suggesting I follow 1,001 different women like your wife (I’m not going to because I don’t see the point). But it’s pretty common.
Do you watch porn? Do you have the same issues with your use?
Have you tried to join her? Like workout with her? Or maybe take photos for her? Just try to be involved a bit more. That way your insecurities can subside. It’s just a thought. Try to give her more attention than those men. Go follow her and comment “you go my beautiful wife” or “love to see you happy and healthy baby” just nonchalantly assert your dominance and presence without making a huge fuss. Throw some hearts under her post. Be her BIGGEST FAN because if you are there’s no room for other guys. Hope this helps a little!
She actively blames you for your short comings in the marriage to justify posting her ass on the internet. Did she once talk to you about the lack of love you, touching and initiating sex?
You are lucky. My wife put on weight and went from 147lbs to 250lbs and is only 5′ 1″ tall… I would kill to have my wife be a super hot, fit instagram model. She probably is farming ‘simps’ for more advertising deals and hopefully to make $$. Be happy that she picked YOU over everyone else giving her attention and enjoy the sex and the relationship.
Doesn’t sound like either of you are addressing the root issues behind her attention seeking and your inability to value her without jealousy. How can you increase the things you do and enjoy together and appreciate each other as a couple?
This may sound stupidly simplified but really. Just compliment her lots on her body and what she’s achieved fitness wise and literally anything else. Because her love language seems to be Words of Affirmation. This will give her the feeling of being loved by you rather than just the head knowledge that she’s loved. It needs to make its way down to her heart to satisfy her enough that she stops trying to get that feeling of being loved from social media comments. Blaming it on you though, isn’t nice of her. She knows she’s not right. Blame means she knows what she’s doing is not right but she doesn’t want to take responsibility and own her intentions. She’s just flipping the conversation around on you. And the fact she posts no family pictures? She’s curating a little gallery of sex and self that she feels will give her that verbal affirmation she craves from you. Your sex life has already improved so that’s good, although it’s only after you noticed someone else wanted her. I guess she wants to feel desirable, have your positive attention and be sexually satiated but really it would be better to work on your pre-existing relationship conflict so that you’re not giving her the cold shoulder when she wants sex, leading to this whole hunt for attention that she does. While she enjoys someone else’s attention, it’s your attention that she actually wants and needs and I’m sure she likes that she’s provoking your jealousy.
Y’all need to address the relationship hangups that caused your lack of sex to begin with.
Sounds like you are lucky she hasn’t left you already. Genuinely, you sound like a child who is upset that someone is playing with the toy you haven’t touched in years.
Work on yourself and focus on being a better husband and leave your wife’s SM accounts out of it.