Asking just for perspective from guys and some advice here. I’m 20 and had to get major surgery on my breast because of a health issue. Now there’s a huge scar across my boob that didn’t heal particularly well, so it’s purple and wide and just ugly looking. I’m so insecure now that I am terrified to ever sleep with somebody. Another issue is that it made my nipple and boob SUPER sensitive. If a guy even attempts to grab it i’ll probably scream in pain (what a turn on). I just want the truth tbh. Would a scar turn you off and does EVERY guy insist on groping your boobs. Do I tell a guy about it before I sleep with him? Also, if anyone can relate on the surgery part, do you have any device? Thanks in advance.
23 comments
Have you checked with your doc to see if anything can be done about the sensitiveness?
I have been with multiple women who had scars on their breasts. One had the type you described. Another had no nipples. And the third had scarring around the nipple and then down her breasts form a reduction. I was never turned off or disturbed by them. To me they were just a part of her, and sometimes we made a game out of it during foreplay to trace them with my fingers or tongue. I think most guys will react like this, but some will be assholes a out it.
Most guys will grope your breasts during foreplay/ getting spicy. Because this is one of those things that is assumed to be normal. Like rubbing a thigh or kissing. However, you can simply tell them upfront. Something like “hey, I have very sensitive breasts and can’t really deal with them being groped, so for the time being, let’s not do that. Deal?”
Dated a woman with a breast scar, my only concern was making her feel great about how her body looks.
First get it checked by the doctor.
Second it would not be a turnoff. Be prepared for questions and/or him asking ‘does this hurt’ but otherwise I would not think it a problem.
You are young and hot! A scar is nothing – a sexy young lady why is ready for sex is the best! Enjoy your life and your body – both are amazing.
I’m not a guy so can’t really speak for that. But I think that if you’re with somebody and that is a negative thing for them then you shouldn’t be with them. That definitely speaks more to them than it is about you. You deserve someone who make you feel like the most beautiful person in the world and they you don’t have to cover up.
But clearly this is very important to you so my opinion is that it’s probably a conversation you should have with them prior to them seeing it. Because again that’s a good way to gauge where they stand on it and can show you what type of person they are.
Don’t let some guys determine your self-worth.
If it is that sensitive though it sounds like you might have complex regional pain syndrome or something like that from the scar and there are different forms of desensitization that can be done to help assist in making it better. Talk to your Dr. Also there is physical therapy for those who had surgery on the breast that can help relieve potentially some of your symptoms as Scar Tissue can be present. Feel free to reach out to me more if you have more questions. I’m a PT.
No
As a 30 m, it wouldn’t bother me one bit.
Some don’t even notice
Not at all. My girl has scars and she is the most beautiful woman I’ve seen naked.
Wouldn’t bother me when I was younger or now.
I would tell it anyone before sleeping with them. But not because of the looks, but because it is good to know that touching the area is painful for you.
I do not care about scars on other people.
But I can relate with the insecurity about it. (I have some scars on my body as well and they are broad and off putting in my own opinion.) I had to learn, that a partner will not care about the scars and will find you sexy with them.
For my own comfort I showed my scars to my partner before sex even was an option. Because I did not want a bad reaction in that context. And still think that was a good idea, because it made me feel really relaxed when it came to sex for the first time.
I know its slightly different than your situation, but this year my girlfriend had her kidney removed with open surgery because of cancer. She has quite large scars down her abdomen. She is beautiful. Her scars just show me she’s brave and strong. Its not a turn off for me. But I know for her she needed reassuring. So I would say, a guy that finds it a turn off, is the wrong guy. And you’re better off without that guy anyway. A guy who sees how strong you are for your strength and everything you’ve been through will think your scars are beautiful.
It won’t stay purple it should fade to translucent over time. Recommend bio oil after it’s healed fully
If a guy is worth fucking he won’t be bothered
Princess Bea (or was it Eugenie?) had her wedding dress backless to show off a massive scar.
Personally its likely it would not turn me off if i already found you attractive to begin with. The sensitivity part would be the real issue, most men wont insist on grabbing your boobs but most men want to. Its just the universal happy place, boobs are the common denominator, ive never seen anyone upset with a boob in their hand, scarred or unscarred. Id suggest if anything to check up with the doctor about dealing with that extreme sensitivity.
No. I had a FWB who had breast reduction surgery scars. Never bothered me.
I wouldn’t worry about it. But you can get a little bottle of vitamin E oil at any pharmacy store in the vitamin section. I used it on my arm to help my scar heal.
I’ve had a boob reduction and non of the guys I’ve dated or slept with really cared and my scared didn’t heal well lol
Any time a woman is willing to show me their breasts let alone let me touch them I’m not going to critique. And no. Scars are not a turn off.
That said communicate before things get spicy. Talk about the sensitivity before hand and be clear on the things you need/want from him.
It would not bother me one bit (M)
Which guy? You need to give a profile of that guy. Every guy is different.
Personally it won’t be a turn off, i would be consious about it but only out of care.
I would say that regarding of touching boobs, it is something that each guy decides by themselves. On my case i would preffer to touch, but it is not a necessity for a pleasant sexual exchange.
I do everything i can to avoid actively hurting others, so whatever would go against your well being is a no go on my book.
Nope. Boobs are boobs. I want them either way!
Guy here. I would not be put off by it at all.
RE: Your nipple, you need to tell your mate that they need to be really careful with what they do. It just may need to be off limits.
Hopefully your doctor can do something to help with that part.