As the title says. Sometimes I am extremely confident and talkative I am in the mood to talk with ANYONE, literally anyone; that’s the version of myself that was able to get me most of my friends and most of my happy memories.
However I also have so many times where that confidence just disappears and I am extremely shy. And I hate it because it feels like I lied to my friends about who I am but I truly love my confident self I just can’t control when I have it.
I have tried many ways to keep that confidence up by working out, having a nice posture and essentially faking it till I make it. But that doesn’t always work.
I don’t get it how can I have the ability to be so confident and talkative; but can’t use it always ?
Does anyone else feel the same way ?
I would love to just remain confident always but I don’t know how.
12 comments
I can totally relate to this. I haven’t figured out what makes me more talkative, but could be mood, energy levels etc. But what really helped me was to accept the fact that I won’t always feel like talking a lot in social situations, so instead in those cases I just focus on other people and just listening to what they have to say. This helps me to feel confident even in my silence, if that makes sense.
Check the foods and drinks you consume, especially if they contain caffeine, which causes you to overthink and leads shyness. It’s also okay to be shy at times. If you’re not confident, you’ll be easy to approach. Perhaps the universe is attempting to introduce you to new people.
Sounds a little like cyclothymic temperament. Make it a strength !
One of the factors could be the people you’re around. If you’re among friends with whom you don’t care what the others think, are playful and have a bit of banter going, you will carry that confidence and dgaf to the next conversation. It pretty much snowballs if your next conversations are good as well.
The times you’re more shy, are you spending more time around someone who makes you feel insecure or who is verbally abusive towards you?
Would you say that your overall mood also changes when your confidence disappears?
I think everybody do this. We all have good moments.
Anthony Robbins wrote a book about that .You should try relive in your head, your best moment.Feel all the powerful emotions again from your past. I think his ideas are great.
When we feel down or shy we can
– think about a moment you were confident
– listen energizing music
– achieve something
– working out is great too
It has to do with energy, mood and interactions
Sometimes after u give like a lecture or talk to so many people in a day, ur sociability rises and u become more confident in it
A good trick i used to do was to jump for like 10 seconds and keep an open body language.
I felt an immediate difference, i wore a smile and looked everyone in the eye.
Try this and read more on the subject, check charisma matrix or charisma on command or the chrisma myth
Maybe theres also a part of you that is not confident which supresses your energy and gives you blockages to flow. Try to heal it instead of trying to avoid it
i feel the same. i suffer from mild social anxiety and my therapist told me that it’s normal to have those moments where you’re extremely confident.
i don’t know if that’s what it is for you. but just wanted to tell you that it likely happens to many people 🙂
i sometimes spend a week being so talkative and confident and don’t shy away from talking to anyone but then again i don’t feel like talking to anyone i‘m not close with. it’s so annoying..but just know that you’re not alone 🙂
Think about what you’ve eaten in the last 24 when you’re up or down. Sugar and junk foods really do a number on my moods. I also agree that it can be the people you’re with.
Have you tried eating only kale? I hear that works.