How long did the worst crisis in your relationship last and how did you overcome it with your partner even when it seemed helpless and doomed?

5 comments

1. [removed]

2. I wouldn’t say it was doomed, but we hit a rough moment back in October where my partner had been acting “off” and it caught up to him.
   We had to work through it, and I had to find peace with it. Communication is such a big factor even if it hurts in the moment- and that’s something I’m working on with being more vocal instead of shutting down. But, I think being honest instead of being sneaky or shady is worlds better.

3. He had a League of Legends addiction that lasted around 2 months, we didn’t overcome it, I left him

   CSo basically we met through a friend during college and we instantly liked each other, we both loved video games and anime and everything nerdy, we played WoW together and a bunch of other games and were constantly spending time together both online and in person, eventually he started REALLY focusing on a game called League of Legends, like suuuuper focused, he would play for 15-20 hours a day and barely sleep or eat, I had a spare key to his apartment and would come over every day after my classes or my work shift, I went over one day and there were just bottles of pee everywhere, he told me he was in a long match and couldn’t use the bathroom, the smell was overwhelming for sure but it didn’t stop there, turns out he was holding in POOP for literally hours and it eventually started seeping out, he was literally slowly shitting his pants and he refused to move, I would spend some time cleaning up his apartment and making food and begging him to please shower and eventually he did, when he gave me dirty clothes to wash there were skidmarks all in his underwear, like he had shit himself and just didn’t move for hours, I almost puked washing his clothes…so I sat him down one day and begged him to take a break from the game and stop acting like this, I told him I was lonely and wanted to go out with him and do things and that he was being insanely unhealthy and REALLY fucking gross, he agreed to stop playing the game…for about 2 days, during our anniversary date he said “Actually I need to go home, I promised my League friends I’d be online at this time” and he fucking left

   MI broke up with him less than 24 hours later, he begged and cried and literally screeched like an animal when I told him I was leaving him, he kept saying he loved me and that he can’t help but play the game and blah blah blah, broke up with him and didn’t look back, looked him up on Facebook years later and he’s done absolutely nothing with his life, he quit his job and dropped out of college and is now living with his parents and somehow lost all his hair and gained massive amounts of weight, I guess I dodged a bullet

   FI love video games as much as the next person, but I’ve NEVER become gross over them lol

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5. This might be minor, but before my boyfriend and I moved in together (after dating for 6 years, high school sweet hearts), he was used to working late on his computer every day and I was used to going to bed early. We had a tiny living room, but a slightly larger bedroom so that´s where we put his desktop. He would sit in our bedroom at night, with the lights on, clicking and typing (tick tick tick), sometimes until 2AM because he´s a night owl and swears that´s when he does his best work. I had to get up at 6AM and was used to going to bed at 10PM. It seriously drove me crazy, and even though he could also work at the kitchen table on his laptop, he preferred his desk and the desk top. It drove me crazy. I was exhausted, snappy, angry.

   But honestly, I wasn´t easy either. I was very controlling. I still believe he was wrong for keeping me awake all night. But with other things in the house, I tried to fully control everything. What grocery stores we went to, how much money we spent (we did not have money problems, this was about me wanting to be in control), when he was allowed to go out to exercise, when he was or wasn´t allowed to meet his friends. Not just when the house was cleaned, but also how. I would cry and pout and blame all my problems on him.

   We fought almost every day for half a year. Then, I went on a study trip for two weeks and came back. I don´t really know what changed, but we took a vacation right after, talked about everything, and when we came back it kind of just.. stopped. He worked in the living room at night, I didn´t care as much when he went out. Being able to get a full night´s sleep helped. Together 13 years now, married almost 4. But we had to learn how to live together.

   Communication is key. Also, blaming someone else is not communication and yelling every mistake they made at them is not communication.