Dating is fucked up, to make it simple… I stopped creating expectations and decided to stop trying, insisting is resisting, it’s overwhelming and I rather just go with the flow, and let things happen.
The only problem is, that things don’t just happen, people have to be compatible with each other. I feel like I could be in a room with 100 different women of all colors, ages, vibes, and preferences, and none of them would likely want me and vice versa.
Although this bothers me, I try to focus on myself and just live life. What I’m having trouble accepting is that at some point I’m gonna find someone who I admire, a woman that is just awesome, but I have no idea of what I’m supposed to do to “get” her, chances are, like most women, she’s not gonna be into me.
Once you are okay with yourself and your life, it comes down to luck, and I’m afraid I won’t know what to do when I get lucky enough to find a great woman, so. Is it possible to date someone you like and admire?
1 comment
Hey there, my man!
Let me correct a few things here.
Dating is not fucked up; you might be going in with high expectations all the time and walking away with none of them met.
Going with the flow is a mistake. By doing so, you are basically sending out the message that you do not know what you value and want in someone. Many women might be able to sense this in you and probably walk away because you cannot give them the reassurance they seek.
It also sounds like you do not see yourself as good enough. That is probably your biggest problem right now. You are speculating too much about how others perceive you, which can be dangerous as you may fall deep into a hole of self-victimization.
It comes down to luck to meet someone special, but it does not come down to luck to be with someone special. The former is by chance, while the latter is by choice.
I would suggest you start by dropping the negative self-talk. Then, go out there. If things do not go the way you had hoped, take what you learned from it, reflect on it, and keep pushing forward.