TLDR : I used to dating apps too much and I don’t know how to date in real life anymore aka. I text like sh\*t
Hey guys,
Just kinda venting and asking for advices here.
So recently, I kinda grew tired of dating apps. Even though I got some dates and got lucky a few times, I felt it was difficult to have meaningul relationships. It was just too flakky, superficial, artificial. Because of the abundance of choices, people will always be looking for better opportunities. In the end, those apps just ended up making me more frustrated, sadder and less confident.
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And specifically, because at some points I only relied on that app to meet girls, I also kinda “lost” my skills on how to meet girls IRL.
One example is my texting game. For online apps, it is always better to ask the girl on date as soon as possible, like after 5-6 messages. Because if you take too much time on it, it is very likely that she might match someone more attractive and ghost you. I know ofc that it depends on the girl but in the long run, that’s my feeling about dating apps texting.
Now that I stopped it, I started “real life” dating again. But what before worked on Tinder, Bumble is totally out of place now. Now, when I suggest on meeting after 5-6 messages, I get 95% of the time rejected. After talking to my friends about that, they are telling me that it is waaaayyy too soon and that I have to text more, create more comfort and attraction before making a move. This might be biased, as the girls I am texting are most of the time with conservative mindset and most of the time looking for serious relationships (as far as I know).
So my issue right now is that I just feel completely lost. I really don’t know what I should do with girls. All the game I learned with dating apps is now irrelevant.
So have some of you been in a similar situation ? What do you think about my view on that ? Do you guys have some advices for me ?