Hey r/sex, this is a throwaway because it helps with my anxiousness of this whole situation.
I am a masc cis male, rather traditional, have only ever done relationships (not a fan of hookup culture) and for a long time have been looking for the one (only looking at women so far). However over the past year I have been thinking more and more about guys having a few gay kisses too and I think I would want to try being with a man both In a relationship and sexually.
I don’t really know how to approach this though as I’m extremely inexperienced and If I knew where to find a guy I fear they will turn me down for having no experience (I’ve tried giving BJ’s to a dildo and i think I did ok? And my ass was way too tight in the past to get anything up there)
I would really appreciate some advice on trying to be Bi and anyone elses personal experiences/advice that may help.
2 comments
I 100% was inexperienced when I experimented with men, and I did not find it hard to find hook-up candidates. I used Tinder and Grindr mostly.
I will say they were not super quality candidates, so maybe go for higher quality dating apps of if you want higher quality men. No a guarantee, but better odds.
I found giving a blowjob easier than I expected. I think if you just talk about it and give it your best shot, you’ll do fine.
As the other fella said: Timder and Grindr are good places to start. Also check if your city has an m4m or r4r subreddit, that’sa pretty good resource and in a community you’re already familiar with.
It sounds like you feel like a bottom and that’s great! You’d do well to get a “training kit” of butt plugs, they’re a set that gets larger to work your way up. It takes time to get used to the feeling and it WILL hurt to start with toys (or the real thing fwiw). But remember: **lube is your friend.** Use lots and use often.
I was in the same boat as you and I admit I wish I experimented more when I was younger. Good luck on your journey and remember to be safe, consent is key, and have fun!