I’m currently unemployed and a 31m. Moved out less than a year ago for the second time in my life and my job loss was unexpected. I’m looking to career change into the tech field and I’m going through the self taught developer route right now.

I’m currently just burning through savings by living alone. I maybe have a year of runway to live here with roommates.

I’ve played around with the idea of moving back home to lessen my own financial burden and possibly help my parents out with rent and a mortgage.

I’m just worried about the mental health issues it could cause and the stigma it has with living at home unemployed.

Any advice here? I’m in a decently HCOL area.

7 comments

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  2. Why not work on the side ? and study when you got time ? you are 31 years its about time to prioretize yourself over the rest, get a job that gives you food on the table, study on the side even if it takes 10 years and get your shit together.

    ​

    my Pro Tip:

    1. is if you are not in the tech field, you can always get the chance to start in a big company as a supporter / service desk / help desk. you work there 1-2 years and tell your boss its your goal to work as a supporter / system engineer once you are there you earn enough to have enough room for studying on the side .
    2. If dev is really what you like todo, building a brought portfolio is essential ( if you need tips on what to build i can give you a free example)
    3. Patience and Focused work – it takes time to change your path, but in my time ive seen many people flip their whole life around in 1-2 years by soley focusing and stop the excuses.
    4. good luck – its a part of every story but never the sole factor

  3. Get another job in the field you are already qualified for and learn the new skills for a job change on the side. At least that’s what I would do, but I would rather live in my car than move back in with my parents.

  4. As a practical matter, the “stigma” only pertains to you attempting to find a partner or a relationship. Given your situation, you should probably focus primarily on getting your career on track before you venture into the dating world (for anything beyond something casual).

    Are your parents willing to take you back in provided you pay rent? If so, then it simply boils down to finances and whether living with rooms at a higher cost is worth it to you.

  5. Don’t move back in with your parents unless you absolutely have to. Unless you have incredible discipline, you will slowly lose all ties to your former identity and regress to a dependent state that will be difficult to revert from.

  6. What sort of work are you looking for in tech? I started at helpdesk and worked my way up to a fortune 500 engineer spot by job hopping.

    Even if it’s an ego hit, start low on the totem pole and spend a year doing that then job hop for a better position and rinse and repeat. If you have any tech competency, you can be in a good role within 5-8 years making over six figures.

    I moved back home at 25 and hated it and was depressed. You do what is best for you but I know I would rather hunt down roommates and take a lesser role than move back home.

  7. Put the stigma away for now and focus on you. I moved back with parents to get back on my feet and it was the reset I needed.

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