Hello Reddit, What do you think of this situation?
My girlfriend went on vacation with her family to Las Vegas and they saw some friends of her family there.
Everything was normal until she called me this morning to tell me that yesterday they went out to a club (My girlfriend Karla (k), her sisters and the sons of the other family (E (20yo) and F (32yo)) and already returning to their room (they are all staying in the same hotel, my girlfriend has a room for her own) one of the sons from the other family (F) accompanied my girlfriend to her her room, then they stayed talking for a while and (F) kissed her, she says that because of the alcohol, it took her some time to react but she pushed him off and told him that she didn’t want that. She tells me that after that they continued talking normally and he approached putting his hand into her blouse to touch her breasts while he told her to cheer up. She says that she pushed him away again in the same way and he left.
\#A while ago she called me to tell me that they will all go out to party again, she tells me that she already talked to him about it, that she told him that she talked to me about what happened and that it was wrong to even have tried something. So she’s sure it won’t happen again.
What do you think from this?
PD: Sorry, English is not my main language
TL;DR: GF wen on a vacation and got kissed.
8 comments
It sounds like she’s telling you all of the details, so you can decide what you’re comfortable with. She went to a family wedding and went to a club with family/friends. Someone came on to her, she said no, she told you, and she warned him that she told you. I don’t see what else you need. She sounds super respectful.
I think you should trust her. she told you it happened and told the guy. She didn’t do anything wrong, it was the guy.
Seems alright… However I think inviting him to her room is a bit of a grey area / further invitation.
There’s a good chance she was enjoying the attention – but didn’t want to cheat.
Also the fact that she’s gonna go party with him again tonight confirms that… She would be okay with him if the situation was different “but she has a bf”.
Let’s put it this way: instead of having an early night and making sure there’s no space for something like this to reoccur, your girlfriend is prioritising continuing to party with a guy who made *very* explicit advances on her after she invited him to her room.
I think she didn’t cheat. She didn’t wait a few days/ weeks to pass before telling you and told you right away which was respectful of her.
This guy made advances on her and she told him to stop which is a good thing.
She also set a clear boundary with this dude by telling him she has a BF and she told her BF what happened.
If (F) makes another move on her despite her setting that boundary, that means he’s just a total a**h*le and she needs to be careful not to let her fall in a situation where she’s alone with this guy because it gives him the opportunity to do stuff to her.
It’s hard protecting yourself as a girl when there is a very persistent pervert who doesn’t know when to quit.
(Note: I don’t know your GF personally so I can’t tell if she would ever lead a guy on. But if she doesn’t have history of leading guys on for attention in the past, you should trust her unless she does something that’s blatantly cheating like initiating the kiss or inviting the guy to sleep in her bed at the hotel etc.)
You need to talk and agree to boundaries. My partner and I both agree that there will be no contact with people who flirt / act inappropriately with either of us (if they know we are in a relationship). I would definitely not be comfortable with my partner going out socially with this person again.
It is pretty sketchy. The problem seems to be that the two families are hanging out, so it may be difficult to not see those guys again, but if you find that he came to her room again, just know that the story you got was fiction.
She was assaulted. Advice for her would to either be to refuse any invitation to go out with this person or at the very least, don’t drink much, if at all. She can also report him for the assault.