Hi all, was after some advice! My goal this year was to create and foster more authentic relationships with new people. I’ve found in previous relationships (e.g a crush or even new friends) that often there’s more time spent messaging online than there is connecting in person. I find it easy to enjoy the convo, that the convo can be more curated (you have time to think of replies) and there’s a disconnect between the online persona and who the person is in reality. I said to myself I wouldn’t fall into this trap – but I’m back in the situation. How would you feel if someone asked to keep getting to know you more during in person catch ups, and lessen the messaging, despite messaging a lot initially?
Edit. There’s also the difficulty in interpreting the tone of things, and things may be coming across more flirty than anticipated etc
3 comments
Do it. Keep true to what you want
You have a Great opportunity to connect in person. Do it ! It will make you stand out and strengthen your connection. Your true social skills come out in person. People reveal who they are in person. Read all the tips listed here, especially the ones on genuinely connecting with people, interacting in person, and adding value to people’s lives: https://www.reddit.com/r/socialskills/comments/trlexh/how_to_avoid_being_needy_or_stop_being_needy/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
There is no problem with preferring offline meetups, however, you have to be clear with your intentions and choose locations that the other party will also feel comfortable in.
If I was asked for an offline meetup, then I would like for everything to be laid bare beforehand, and I would enjoy if it was in a public place, at least until my initial uneasiness subsides.
I guess it really does depend on the person, but I would personally enjoy more offline meetings, as long as the above criteria are satisfied!