As someone in a long term relationship who had a threesome to “spice things up”, how was your experience? Was there any negative aftermath?

5 comments

1. My experiences with open relationships have been mostly positive. I’ve never been a particularly monogamous person, though I’ve had to compromise for a few guys I really liked.

   I’ve experimented with different kinds of open relationships with different partners and my personal favorite kind of open relationship is when my partner and I have sex with other people and are entirely transparent about it, without going into too much detail (I tell my bf in advance whenever I plan on having a hookup and I ask for his consent and vice versa). Each person does their thing with the other person and we go about our business as usual. I don’t need to know all the details.

   I’ve also experienced some jealously and drama from an ex after he brought a couple of his male friends/ acquaintances into the bedroom. This can be fine with the right group of people, but it can also be quite messy and disastrous, I’ve had it both ways.

2. I’ve never done a threesome to “spice things up” that’s just using someone. And non-monogamy is not the way to fix issues in a monogamous relationship. I’ve had more than one threesome because all three of us wanted to and there was no potential for complicated feelings etc

3. I have found it to be overall positive. I’ve never had any jealousy issues with my husband or drama in general; the only issue I’ve ever had is a partner we had ended up breaking up after we all slept together, and they both tried to “claim” me as their friend.

4. This was years ago and I did have one to make the person I was with happy… and I hated every second of it and felt absolutely horrible afterwards. Still do…

5. The last time was forced. I didn’t really bond with the woman or have enough time to bond. I felt like I had to force myself to be attracted to her.

   I didn’t care for the experience and I think I’d be happy to never do one again. The girl would have to be reallyyyy special for me to partake in another one. I already have a hard enough time bonding with people in general so I don’t think it’s worth the time or effort to find another woman for the bedroom.

   I don’t care if the BF wants to go on dates with other women. Just don’t invite me or get me involved. I’m not interested.