So I’m 26M I recently have moved to a foreign country where I don’t speak their native language and without knowing anyone there!
I had hard times in the beginning being alone and sad, fast enough I managed to meet many people in the most random way ( see my previous post ).
Now, I have way too many people I call friends, like I always have plans or things to do and since I am almost in FOMO ; I tend to do most of these plans and end up very exhausted, my phone never stops from calls and messages from friends. Sometimes people get jealous if choose a plan of their plan or if I don’t hang with as much
My question is :
How do you manage such a busy social life and so many friends ? And how much is enough ?
2 comments
I dont know if you’re exactly like a very good friend I used to have( i stopped talking to him because i left the lifestyle and he was going down a path i wanted nothing to do with). We called him popular, becuase he would constantly meet new people, I would meet people and get invited but not like he would. He would take me with him most of the times to those plans, unless they were just hang out sessions. I think people like you and him meet a lot of people becuase its clear you arent clingy and its really not going to be a long term genuine relationship despite what you might say, but that feeling is mutual, both parties are cool with that. However I think people who struggle to meet people can come off as clingy and want a real deep friendship, not just someone who they can have a good time with and say goodbye to. Most of those people he met didnt last more than a year or 2. I dont know if that what you are doing but thats what you remind me of. Its still good to be able to meet new people all the time, but I think if you gave off a vibe that you want to be a close friend for life and need them to be there for you, it probably wouldnt matter if you were brad pitt, people are not going to want to invite you from just meeting you at some random place. But again, i dont know you, im just speculating.
There’s a rule: max limit close friends is 5(the people you would call out of work to take to cancer treatment or something), & max limit acquaintances 15(people you get along with socially)
You’re experiencing burnout because people are afraid to be bored and you’re using them as much as they’re using you.