Started school in September and I am still having trouble making friends, unfortunately. This is my second quarter as a third year. (First 2 years were online because of covid). I have only managed to make one friend and we only really hang out in school like getting lunch at the dining halls. He goes home on the weekend too. A few weeks after school started, this girl from high school said hi and we talked for a minute, and then she followed me on Instagram. She seems like a nice person so I thought it would be a good idea to ask her to hang out. my problem, however, is that I don’t know how to not make it seem like a date. I met this one girl at one of the only parties I went to, and I asked her to hang out a few days after the party. She said she was busy and seemed uninterested in hanging out. I asked if she wanted to get lunch, so I’m thinking I made it seem like a date when I didn’t intend for it to come off that way. I really just want to hang out with someone outside of school. So what can I do differently in my current situation? Not specifically to this one person, but to anyone.
Also, how do I make friends in college in general? Making friends in class feels so awkward. Getting their Instagram also feels awkward. My problem comes after this part. I feel too embarrassed and awkward to ask them to hang out. Getting people’s Instagram is anxiety-inducing enough and I can’t bring myself to ask them to hang out. I’m pretty sure it’s my fear of rejection. I just want someone to talk to though. I feel so alone in my dorm all the time. And time goes by so fast. I feel like I wasted everything. I know that I’m either going to have to just get more confident and stop overthinking and push through the awkwardness or continue to be sad and lonely so what can I do? And what do people do when they hang out anyways?
Any advice is greatly appreciated. I’m just so exhausted from not doing anything.
1 comment
I get how you feel and am having the same problem. Been telling myself that even if the invite doesn’t work out at least I’d have tried. Worst outcome in both scenarios is just not having that person become a friend.
I would probably start some random conversation, lead into the thing i’d want to hang out at, say something like “i’ve been wanting to check this place out, would you want to come with me?”.