I went on a date with a guy from Bumble and everything went more or less fine. We had dinner. I wasn’t that attracted to him but anyways. He brought me home and when I gave him 2 kisses on his cheeks to say goodbye, he robbed me a kiss and grabbed my ass…
Is this okay? I mean, he was a little drunk but I’m not sure if this is okay or not since it wasn’t consentual. I don’t know what to do now. He wants to meet again and I’ve been texting him but now I’m freaking out.
Is this a bad attitude? I didn’t want to kiss him at that moment, and that ass grab was too much for me…
14 comments
What future makes you more upset? Have you talked to him about how you feel about being grabbed? Have you expressed that?
Oof. Girl, ask yourself if you really want to put yourself at risk of something like that happening again or, and I can’t stress this enough, if this is just you wanting to people-please?
I don’t know you, but I’ve been in mindsets like yours because I put other people’s feelings above my own feeling of safety/security. There’s nothing wrong with choosing you.
If it makes you feel uncomfortable then you should not see him again. Never compromise on your personal boundaries. Of course you should communicate your feelings to him too. If you were both drunk he may have gotten carried away which is never ok alcohol or not.
From what I’m reading you don’t feel safe with this person. Your feelings are valid trust yourself.
As a woman I don’t enjoy being grab in the ass by someone I’m not intimate with. You have the right to your body and you are not a bad person for telling someone they violated your personal space. You don’t have to put up with it or make excuses.
How do you want to be treated and is this person capable of treating you the way you want?
Being drunk is not an excuse to be a creep. Either he doesnt know how to handle his alcohol but drank on first date OR he’s just like that normally. Neither looks good for him, in my opinion.
If it makes you feel uncomfortable then you should not meet him again. And alcohol is not a excuse.
Not ok, **its Sexual Assault stay away from him.**
If you have the assault on camera certainly report him to police. You can report him anyways to get him on record. Unfortunately, it is a he said she said situation. If enough incidents get reported to show a pattern the cops start digging.
Get some boundaries and some confidence and let him know what he did was out of line. If he pulls something similar again in the future then dump him on the spot.
No do not see him again. Ever. He’s a creep who just wants sex. I mean, unless that’s what you want too but you said you were not even attracted to him. It is not cool what he did, especially that ass grab.
Why go on another date? You are not that interested.
The fact that your asking here makes the answere somwhat obvious, yeah?
Based on very little information about what was said, he should have at least apologized for the “missread of the situation” and stopped at that. You’re supposed to feel comfortable, even in the beginning. Go get a better fish, one that feels safe!
Don’t date this guy again. First of all, he crossed his boundaries just by doing that and if you’re gonna go out with him again he’ll do much worse than that for sure.
Run away!
Girl what? For what reason would you see him again? I read no good things in the post