I’m a lesbian, my fiance is bi. We have been together almost 3 years now.
A few months ago she told me that she sometimes misses hetero sex. I didn’t think anything of it at the time. Now she asked for one night that she can be with a guy and that would be her birthday present. She told me that she has some pent up frustrations would would like one night to get rid of them.
We are happy, have a good sex life. I don’t have thoughts of her cheating on me. If she would have asked to be with another woman I would have been furious. With a man, I don’t know what to think. I don’t have fears of her leaving me for a man, and I know she is bi. I don’t want some kind of bedroom frustration to create a rift between us but at the same time I don’t know about this.
TLDR: My fiance wants to spend a night with a man and I don’t know what to think
5 comments
Are you okay with an open relationship? That’s the question.
It won’t be just for her birthday. She’s going to want more D so a real conversation needs to be had. Idk why if she wanted a woman it’d be an issue but her wanting to have what you can’t ever give her isn’t threatening. I’m bi myself but I’ve never wanted to mess with a man when I was with my ex gfs. Personally I wouldn’t even be interested in staying in that but I wish you all well.
Its been said plenty of times before but being bi isnt a license to have sex with other people. She can want sex with another person all she likes but she went into the monogamous relationship with you with her eyes open.
Woman or man, its no different. Lots of people seem to feel that its different because they’re Bi but its still sex with another person. You shouldnt feel any different or respond any differently than if she was asking to have sex with another woman.
She’s trying to get out of cheating, by telling you that it’s a birthday present. I would tell her that it’s probably a good idea because then you could go be with someone else, too. Sounds like she has someone in mind already, so you both get to cheat on each other or you open up your relationship or you break up. I personally would have to consider breaking up because she is using the pent up frustrations as an excuse and if she’s doing it now, she will continue to do it.
Sounds like a discussion on ethical non manogamy is needed. You need to work out your limits (even if it’s not doing it at all) and then see if you can agree on a direction together.
Don’t be pressured into anything or it will end badly in the end.