He just graduated from state college and has debt from that – no problem. What he failed to tell me over the last 5 years that we’ve been together is that he has other debt totalling 10k from day to day expenses which he is trying to pay off. We’ve talked about finances before and he never mentioned this. I do not trust him anymore.
Have others gotten through this, this worth breaking up over?
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Edited to add: He did lie bc I had asked him about debts before and he only said the student loans. He has a plan to pay it off that doesn’t include any of my contributions.
4 comments
It’s concerning this didn’t come up in previous conversations about financials. It’s definitely something to know that he can keep secrets. Also avoid any joint accounts until he has everything settled.
That’s a huge breach of trust by lying by omission at the least. I would certainly have to rethink the relationship. What’s his plan to pay the debt off? Is he assuming your combined incomes will be used?
I’m sorry but he’s just your boyfriend…. Not your husband or fiancé.
Did he outright LIE? idk. And how long have you been together? Do you live together? Do you have a joint account?
He might have been ashamed to mention it. Idk I feel like this is an overreaction.
I get that finances are important to talk about, especially as a relationship gets more serious and you start to talk about your future as a couple. But maybe he had a reason for not mentioning it? Maybe he figured because he is already paying it down it’s not that big of a deal?