My partner – John (19m)
SIL – Jane (23f)
SIL’s Fiancée – Kate (24f)
MIL or partner’s mom – Liz (43f)
FIL or partner’s dad – Joe (45m)
(Throw away and fake names bc everyone mentioned uses Reddit) A little more context before I start; I moved in with John about five months ago and he had offered to have me live with himself, Jane, and Kate. Jane and Kate had told me that John did not ask them if I could move in but told them I would be. His mother and father, who own the place, welcomed me and if they didn’t want me in their house, I wouldn’t be here. John’s and Jane’s parents work abroad.
Jane and Kate both vape in the house that isn’t theirs and near me in general. They both know I quit and it was a lot of effort because they tried to quit not too long after I did but they went back to it after a week of cold turkey. I have spoken to both Jane and Kate about vaping in front of me. They both seem understanding when I talk to them. They still vape around me. I caved and said that if they can’t refrain from vaping around me, at least make sure I can’t see them do it. They still do it where I can see them and sometimes while I talk to them. John says I should speak to Joe and Liz. Joe and Liz think that Jane quit a year ago. Jane said she’d tell Joe and Liz that John and I had sex in their bathroom. Joe and Liz know that and don’t care because they knew I would visit for a week at their house while they were gone and Jane told John to sleep in their parents’ room because John and Jane’s rooms are next to each other. I have spoken to Jane and Kate individually and together about their vaping about 7-9 different times since October when I stopped. I last spoke to Jane and Kate about it 5 days ago as of today. John says they tried to quit because of me but I doubt it since they went back a week later and have tried to quit even before I got here. I want to resolve this without getting Joe and Liz involved since we are all adults.
1 comment
If they’re not supposed to be or allowed to vape in the house, everyone needs to sit down and iron out the rules for indoor smoking. Those who do smoke need to be mindful of it. Otherwise, you are going to have to get used to the fact that just because you’ve quit smoking doesn’t mean everyone else has to or needs to accommodate you. If you don’t like seeing it, leave or remove yourself from the situation.