I’m really slow when it comes to comprehending what someone is trying to explain to me. When it gets difficult to understand, my brain automatically zones out. I’m not sure if its brain fog, but when I’m trying my best to also consciously learn and understand something, it gets difficult. Don’t get me wrong, I can go on my day with normal conversations, but some certain concepts is hard for me to grasp which probably makes people sway away from me.
Example: 2 months in my job, manager was explaining to me about a certain concept at work but i dont know why it was so hard to understand. I just decided to say I did so i dont annoy them or become a burden. 7 months in, they have to explain it again but decide to give up and say “this is very dumb” and now im just feeling like I cant operate or conversely normally in any job ever. Wondering how I can go on since I only just annoy everyone around me with not understanding certain things (making it seem like im not listening) not sure if im just dumb or somethings wrong with me
Does anyone relate to this?
6 comments
I completely relate to this but for me it’s as though I have trouble comprehending anything. My mind is perpetually blank and idk how to fix it
It sounds like it’s a stress response.
I’ve been there too.
It’s not you, you’re very capable of developing that skill.
AD(H)D my friend. Been there.
Sounds like ADHD. I know exactly how you feel. I was 60 before I figured it out. My self esteem is terrible because of it. Talk to your doctor about it. Please don’t wait and hate yourself. You are worth it.
Sounds exactly like me. ADHD and no shame in it—we aren’t stupid but it may take us longer to learn and retain things, especially if we are uninterested in the subject.
I consider myself a self-proclaimed expert in learning lol, humble brag here, so here’s my advice.
Ditch completely the idea that you’re being annoying or a burden to someone who’s trying to explain you something. People who genuinely want you to do well and learn and understand, will happily elaborate, use a different way to explain the concept, go into detail, etc etc. In school I was the “annoying” kid who always asked questions. Not understanding something immediately doesn’t make you dumb, everyone has a different foundation of knowledge and passing on information is trial and error.
Which leads me to second point. Ask questions. The second you know you’ve lost the understanding (and focus), ask to stop, retract and walk through the concept again. You zone out as a coping mechanism, because you don’t think you’re allowed to control the pace or to ask for clarifications. It would help a lot if you can roleplay it in a no-stress situation. Ask a friend or family member to practice.
But fair warning, letting go of the guilt you feel for not grasping every bit of information immediately is going to require some time and self compassion.
Again, people who learn well, are just not afraid to look dumb. They see asking questions as a sign they’re truly interested and that they WANT to learn.