We’ve been together for a while now and been having sex for almost a year. Since we got together I’ve always been very awkward about asking for that kind of stuff and she’s mentioned that I word it kinda douchey sometimes without meaning to. What are some good ways to ask politely?

6 comments

  2. Ask her what she would like to be the best approach. Sometimes my SO just grabs my hand and starts. For us we have an agreement for that. It’s all about partnership.

  4. “Hey, so… would you mind giving me a handjob/blowjob, please?” might be a good start, I think? (F here) If she says so, ask her why not and if there’s something that worries her? (She may not like the smell/taste of you down there and not want to do it because of it? Or she might be afraid to disappoint you?)

  5. I don’t always feel comfortable with direct sexual demands because of some history. What I appreciate is my partner communicating when he has desire for me. Aknowledging the feeling is there, but without putting pressure on me. It can be done in a teasing way or if thats your thing idk maybe dirty talk? And then the “kinda-agreement” we have is that if I want to do a bj or hj I communicate to him and he helps me if I need reassurance starting the motion. I also told him I enjoy him touching himself when we’re together and kissing and sometimes if he starts it is easier for me go and do it!

    Overall, I like feeling like someone a partner wants to connect with (communication + reassurance)
    Rather than feeling like something is asked of me (direct question)

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like