So I (25f) been talking to this guy (30m) on/off for like 6 mths now, when we first got talking he said that he wasn’t ready for a relationship. I kept dating others, but we kept in touch. We’ve recently got talking again and things look to be heading in a dating exclusively area. However Im really nervous that his indecisiveness when we first began talking will set a bad precedent for a relationship/ my ideal way to talk to someone would be for it to be really intentional from jump.
Idk I’m I overthinking this or should I be worried?
5 comments
You should talk to him about it. If he still says he isn’t ready for a relationship, do yourself a favour and don’t go down this road.
Circumstances change. 6 months is a long time. Whatever was holding him back back then could have been resolved.
Clear, open, honest communication is always the best way to go. Don’t downplay or ignore your hesitations. Think about whether your valuable time is worth giving him another chance.
I wouldn’t do it unless he can define exactly why he wasn’t ready before and what changed to make him ready now. 6 months is a long time. Circumstances can change, for sure, but I’d be worried he’s going to string me along or change his mind again. I’d find it hard to trust him. And your wording seems vague.. “heading in a dating exclusively area” I assume that’s what you want… heading to the direction of an area seems way too vague. Sounds like you’ve known him long enough that this normal dating dance shouldn’t be this vague. I’d really need this defined more and like I said, I’d need to know what changed for him in order to feel kinda ready to head in a direction of an area. He’s obviously still not ready. Be careful.
Not choosing IS a choice. And you’re not it.