Similarly to how women are insecure about their breast or belly and wear shirts to cover them. Would wearing a skirt be ok?

43 comments

  1. For sure. The only concern is that you feel good together with your partner! You could even turn it into a game 🙂

  2. I wouldn’t mind terribly but I’d rather try to help her get to the bottom of what makes her ashamed of her vagina and hopefully help her feel better about it, so that she doesn’t want to hide it. I’d like her to enjoy it as much as me.

  4. You can just turn it into role play or a whole lingerie vibe if you want. Most people generally are already attracted to people they choose to have sex with and are just happy to be involved.

  5. for me it would get old after a while.
    if im fuckin you a bunch i clearly like you enough to wanna see your breasts. I wouldn’t be a jerk about it but id want to talk to her and see why she feels self conscious

  6. Thing is guys are really visual, you covering literally the good parts during sex tends to decrease the “visual arousal ”

    Read in your post history your issues with “visible labia ” honestly the only person who would really notice it and be distracted by it is YOU. Guys are simple, give them pussy/tits/ass they become oblivious to anything else.

  8. Personally i’d find it a turn on if a girl said she wanted to keep her skirt on but probably after a while I’d be thinking I want something different.

  9. No. But I really like skirts (not all skirts, certainly…) That said, I would probably ask you to eventually take it off, at least sometimes. Or, looking at it differently, the reasoning would have to be discussed and perhaps addressed in therapy.

  10. What if you wore it but pulled it up (babysteps). I’m self conscious of my tummy since having kids so I often wear a cami during, but if it rides or, or even if I sometimes pull it up, I’m not fully covered but somehow I don’t feel as self conscious as if I didn’t have it on at all.

  11. Just an addition. Sex is much more than penetration. It involves a lot of playing and touching and licking and kissing.

    I believe in the beginning you may benefit from a skirt, but touching of the genitalia will occur. And this will benefit you, mind that. In those scenarios that skirt will raise.

  13. Suggest wearing a sexy slip. You can pull down the top, so your breasts are exposed, and there is fabric obscuring the rest of you. It would feel silky and sexy for both of you – until such times as your confidence grows and you can go naked. Normal clothing is probably going to be less comfortable than underwear in a sexy situation.

  14. Yes, it would be a turn off eventually because I wouldn’t be as interested in a partner with such severe body image issues she won’t actually let me see all of her when we are having sex. I don’t mean that to be unkind, but it is true for most people. Working on your own problems with how you see your labia may be more fruitful long term than figuring out clothing options to never have to see it or show it to someone.

  15. I gained weight so also felt insecure about my stomach, but not one guy rejected me over it. Not even when I sended teaser nudes thinking “ah fuck I look so fat in it”.
    So yeah I still don’t like it, but if a guy comments on it, they are out.

  16. Are you serious? Skirts are always a good idea, I’ve never met a man who wouldn’t love a girl in a skirt unless you are referring to the down to your ankle variety. It’s still easy access, but doesn’t have the same flair. Hell I’m a woman and I love a good upskirt shot every once in awhile.

  17. You’re getting some fine advice but I’m gonna give you some tough love advice.

    Insecurity is a huge turnoff for most people. I *completely understand* it’s not something you choose but is just a part of your mental makeup. But it’s something you need to work on. You need to go to therapy and work this shit out or it’s going to haunt you the rest of your life. Not just in sex but every aspect of life.

    Wearing a skirt during sex, in of itself, is not a turnoff. But a constant issue of being insecure about your body will be for most people. Not being able to touch you, see you, hold you, whatever it may be because you’re not comfortable with your body will drive people away. If you’re vocal about those insecurities and are constantly talking about how you don’t like your body it will be even worse.

    I’m not saying you need to have the confidence of Beyoncé at the snap of a finger. I’m saying it needs to be an aspect of your life you need to work on. It needs to be an area of your life you want to improve. It’s an issue that damn near every woman I’ve ever met deals with, you’re not alone in that sense. There are tons and tons of books, podcast, movies, tv shows, everything that deals with this issue. But the most important thing is therapy. Find a woman therapist who you’re comfortable with and I can promise they’ve dealt with this issue 100 times before.

    Good luck

  18. Sure, find people with clothing kinks. They’ll be turned on BY you wearing clothes during sex

  19. insecurity isn’t very attractive, perhaps work on your body image issues instead of your wardrobe

  21. If you wear a skirt, he can still see everything unless his upper body is in full missionary with your faces to eachother. If you’re riding him, facing him or reverse, he won’t be able to see it and your skirt will stay settled for the most part unless he lifts it because he wants to watch. In missionary, a lot of times men raise their bodies up to look down at you and your body. To watch themselves moving inside of you. They do this sporadically so it’s not really avoidable. It’s in the heat of the moment. The motion itself will cause the skirt to rise up to your hips unless you’re standing up. The skirt won’t remain in place. You can do doggy style with a skirt on and he likely won’t see the front but it’s very possible he’ll want to see himself going inside of you from the back. Prone would be a good option. Guys are super visual and want to look at everything bare. Another thing is men will likely want different positions, they’ll switch…2-4 positions during sex. Yes sometimes it will only be one position but it’s one of those things that just happens organically, switching positions or not. You can try counter tops with your skirt on, inside of the car with your skirt on, those might be better choices if you want to remain in one position. If there’s a bed or floor, you’ll likely end up in a few.

    Honestly I have quite a few male friends and have all my life. They’ve been promiscuous at some point (some still are) and I’ve never once heard them complain about the image of a woman’s lady part, that they had sex with. They’re very blunt. They don’t hold back lol. My point is, I don’t really think they care too much. What they do care about is how good in bed you are. This is the winner here. This is what they talk about, it’s what they think about.

  22. Would you be turned off to be with a man who did the same because his dick was not worth seeing?
    Sex doesn’t work like this and you aren’t being fair to yourself.

    Please checkout the vulva gallery on Instagram! There you will see real vaginas and not porn ones!

  23. I took a peek at your post history and I just wanted to let you know there is literally a vagina museum in London that celebrated and showcases labia of all kinds.

    Re: your original question I don’t think it would be a turn off per se (my hubby favors some of my skirts for naughty time but for the most part they eventually do come off once we get into it)

    I also don’t have an “innie” and it took a long time to get over it but I will say that having a loving and understanding partner helped me work through it over the 8 years we’ve been together. I used to be the type to prefer sex in the dark or keeping some clothes on and over time I got comfortable being naked with him. He even prefers lights on so he can see! (I also had therapy over the years to deal with my self esteem/trauma issues with my mom)

    I hope you’re able to find peace op!

  24. When we are in you, we don’t care about anything else and remember all the insecurity is in your head the guy probably doesn’t even know that u are insecure

  25. Judging from your post history, you might not be asking for men’s opinions, but: As a CFNM kink thing? Maybe. But I’d have a hard time feeling the intimacy and vulnerability that makes sex so gratifying if I knew my partner was anxious and distressed.

    I’d do it, and do it gladly. But I’d be focused on getting to a point where my partner was comfortable being naked in front of me before I’d particularly enjoy myself. If it were some extended period of time and my partner still did not trust me to see her naked, I’d have a hard time with that. Of course.

  26. Re skirt i totally get why you would want to do this it will work for a while. I would be like i find it really sexy to fuck under a skirt or lingerie etc. BUT it wont ever work long term imo neither will you want it to. A lot of having sex with someone is about establishing trust, obvs that doesnt happen with hook ups, but if you are having sex repeatedly with someone, you explore and trust each other with your bodies, its literally part of the experience.

    I’ve read through alot of your comments OP and I really wish there was something i could say to make you understand that most men… Short of you having a tail or a third arm etc (even then there will be guys that dig that) men don’t think about this stuff… They think yeah sex 😂 when men say things about vaginas good or bad its just BS they say to other men, they think they are being one of the guys in the same way they talk about cocks, its all non sense, take it as such. Trust me there are more men that would cum on sight to woman with enough confidence to tell them to bury themselves in their ‘fucking ugly’ growler, than want a perfect pussy.

    I have an innie i guess but i am very asymmetric in labia one is much larger than the other, tbh i find it difficult to describe because honestly its not my concern, i don’t look at it regulary at all. How it feels is my concern. I don’t find any vaginas particularly attractive, womens bodies yeah (although i am straight) but all vaginas to me are just a mess of folds, flaps and holes. But fuck me they are fun. My husband has never mentioned it, although he must have noticed. In turn although i am not self conscious about my vagina per se, i am overweight and i do have stretch marks and scarring in places (from adolescence) i never had any complaints when i was playing around and when i met my husband i remember after a few months standing totally naked in front of him in the light and asking him if he liked my body. I trusted him, he just pulled me towards him and told me how much he loved it, i was 100% vulnerable and he told the truth. Now i dont even think about being naked around him, and i am much older and fatter lol, love is blind as they say, if i was naked covered in my own shit and vomit, he is the only person i would want with me and he would lovingly help me and think nothing bad of it, vulnerability is scary but its worth it if you want this type of relationship.

    Its not for you to judge, and dont forget loads of men have these hang ups too plus they have the added shit of not being about to discuss it with anyone. For your own sanity, go with your plan, find someone you trust and just fucking go for it. You will never look back. Or risker but if youre so desperate to prove your point rip the plaster off metaphorically just fuck some stranger and you will see that they dont even notice or that they love it.

  28. I mean, it’d be pretty difficult if your partner wants to eat you out? I assume you’re against it.

    You’ll have to get to the bottom of this. I’m sure it’s not a deal breaker but you’ve got a bigger issue to deal with, and should discuss with your partner.

    It’s a shame to not be able to be confident with your own body. I’m sure your partner would love to see all of you, and you should want to see all of you as well.

  29. Oooo, my wife wears this super short denim miniskirt sometimes around the house to signal she wants to get dirty, and **Now! But not nearly every time we have sex. But it is a super turn on to me- I have a miniskirt kink or fetish. Cant’ get enough of seeing her in the shortest little miniskirt known to the world. And I mean, this skirt is so short I can see the bottoms of her butt cheeks from behind. She would never want wear this thing outside of our house! Which is what makes it even hotter: my wife dresses modestly, so her in that miniskirt is just so sexy. I could hang with her being in a miniskirt everytime we start sex, but most of the time it would come off though its super easy to bang with a miniskirt that short. It doesn’t impede. She also wears it with no panties on underneath, which is just puts me over the moon. But I do love doing it all the way when she keeps the skirt on the whole time sometimes. Standing doggystyle is hot with that skirt on her butt too – the view from behind is out of this world. Again- skirt fetish. My wife also has a sexy nurse miniskirt and a one piece cheerleader outfit. So hot. I would actually be ok with this, but I don;t know what your partner thinks!

  32. Lots of guys are into skirts! I say wear what makes you feel comfortable, but also I’d recommend therapy before you make any major surgical decisions (based on other comments)

  34. You might pavlov him into getting horny whenever you wear a skirt. I pavloved my fuck buddy into getting hard when I took my glasses off. Was hilarious

  35. Wait, holup – you say the following about therapy in [https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/comments/10enb1b/comment/j4td6dx/?utm_source=reddit&utm_medium=web2x&context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/comments/10enb1b/comment/j4td6dx/?utm_source=reddit&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) *”I’m not saying it doesn’t work. I don’t want my brain to be reprogrammed right now because I think making physical changes is important. I’d rather improve psychically first.”*

    You are literally making the claim that you have a “correct” take on your body as being unattractive, with the notion that therapy could get you to “falsely believe” that your body as it stands now is attractive, and thus… lose motivation to “fix yourself”, and “trap yourself in a suboptimal body”??

    Fuck me, you’re waaaay more likely to succeed coming from a place of positive and healthy self-love and being happy about your progress as you work towards realistic goals you set for yourself rather than trying to run away from who you are today. I mean, reality check: if your current method actually worked so wonderfully for you, you’d never have gotten into your current shape now, would you? EDIT: okay, so it sounds like it’s not a weight thing, but you can get plastic surgery whenever too.

    Your mindset is sooooo far gone, I cannot overstate how much society and/or life has fucked you up right there. You need to learn how to love yourself and your body. So you can be happier. More confident. You are beautiful, today. When you were born, no one gave a fuck about if you were pudgy or not. You were celebrated exactly as you were and it was great. That’s the only valid mindset for your body, no matter how out-of-shape you are. EDIT: or whatever you dislike about your body.

    I’m in therapy (for non-health reasons), and I’m in the process of losing a few kilograms. I love my body. Most people don’t think that I need to lose weight, I know what I want though, so I’m working on fine-tuning things and getting to a target weight that I used to be at a few years ago. I can absolutely assure you that being happy is far more of a positive motivation to keep at it than coming from a place of misery and depression.

    OP, get yourself a therapist. You have major mental issues that need work and every thing you’ve written today screams “I need therapy” more than anything I’ve seen on Reddit since I can remember.

  37. The sexiest thing a woman can wear is confidence. It really sucks that so many women feel bad or are insecure about their body in whatever way for all of the reasons. Sex is so much more intimate and enjoyable when people are over their hang-ups, and life as a whole is better as well.

  38. Would X be a turnoff each and every time?

    Yes.

    Even pretty standard or vanilla things get boring, and need to be mixed up. The skirt could be a fun once-in-a-while activity but every time? It just screams out your insecurities in a really bad way, and deprives the both of you of uninhibited animal sex.

  40. Sexybis all about enthusiasm. If someone needs to wear a skirt to get her freak on, who am I to judge?

  41. Wearing a skirt is sexy and fun, I do it often and my partner loves it too. Maybe it can be a good start for you to gaining some confidence about your labia 🙂 or at the very least lessen your negative thoughts about them! Take things slow girl. There is absolutely no rush. I’m 24 and have a good handful of girlfriends that are virgins and not for religious purposes, they just haven’t found someone they feel comfortable to have sex with (partially body image issues). Be kind to yourself. Your obsession with how you look and your sex life seems as if you’re spiraling in negative thoughts. Therapy would help even if you never mentioned sex during it

  43. Hell yeah, skirts are hot. There’s a feeling of spontaneity that comes with having sex with some clothes still on, like you both ‘couldn’t wait to get your clothes off’…maybe I’m in the minority with that but I find it to be quite a turn-on.

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