She agreed to go out, things were set. I get prepared, even turn down an invitation to go out from my friend… Half an hour before, I get in contact to confirm, no response. I check FB and she’s online which means that I’m being ignored. And then, after I deleted her number and unfriended her, she comes saying that she forgot and overslept. Come on. Being ghosted altogether would’ve been less disrespectful.
23 comments
I’m sorry that happened. It’s very disrespectful of her and your feelings are valid. At least you now know what kind of person she is.
I’m sorry that happened. Don’t contact her again. Don’t deal with flakey/rude people like that and good luck in the future.
I’m sorry ☹️ You definitely deserve better! Just move on at that point. Don’t even bother contacting her because it will only get worse. You’ll be okay 😊
How does the FB online system works?
I personally have fallen asleep with my apps left on. So I could see how someone might think I was actively online when I wasn’t.
That being said, if I woke up and realized I had missed a date, or was running late, I’d immediately be all over the place apologizing like crazy!!!
Were there any other clues that she intentionally ghosted you?
I mean could happened it happened to me once I invited a guy over to a nightclub I texted him called him and replied and hour later he called me and told that he fell asleep I told him if he wanted to come I was still at the club with friends he came and spent a good night together
Ugh I’m so sorry that happened to you
Overslept? Did you plan to go out early in the morning? The one time that happened to me is when I unknowingly set up a date with a crackhead. I had a video chat with her after and she looked strung out af.
For real! It’s better sometimes for the person to just disappear than to take you for a fool altogether.
This is such a messed up reality that we’re literally eroding bits and pieces of ourselves in the name of dating and it’s STILL not enough. You’re still not enough. Fuck.
“she forgot and overslept” = “you were option #2 or #3, all booked for the same time slot, and the others fell through.” Take that how you will, but if you made *concrete plans* to meet up and she flaked, I think it is totally reasonable to end whatever relationship you had from that.
Imagine that in any other setting. “Sorry boss, I knew we had a meeting set up for 1 pm, but someone else wanted to get lunch then and that sounded like more fun.” You’d get fired. Its doubly worse for time-sensitive events like movie tickets.
Should’ve replied to her text with, who’s this?
Rude! Last minute cancelers are the worst.
I think there are some assumptions here. You should ask her straight up if she wants to go on another date (something very low key/low stakes) and to be honest about it with you.
Never know what’s going on in someone’s life. Maybe something happened that she isn’t ready to talk to you about. Don’t assume, ask.
She could’ve equally have had a panic attack and didn’t want to go out anymore. Maybe sleeping was the easiest answer. Who knows?
If you still get weird vibes that’s okay too. At least you will get some understanding why, rather than guessing.
Head up, king.
She’s a clown and you deserve better.
Did you meet on OLD? Report her profile
>I check FB and she’s online which means that I’m being ignored.
For future reference this is absolutely not true.
No excuse. Disrespect should never be tolerate. First date you should be too nervous or too excited to sleep.
This is why I always say take everything with a grain of salt. Especially in OLD (which I’m not sure if you met them there since you said you guys were on each other FBs at the time). Anyway, so many people are flaky and unreliable (especially now a days) and more people ghost and disappear than not. You dust yourself off and move on. It sucks at first and I’ve had it happen on different occasions being ghosted or whatever people disappear or the one million one excuses. Even if she did forget she obviously wasn’t prioritizing it. Most people if they are looking forward to a date have a little bit of anxiety or nerves or something, but to oversleep and forget? Come on…..whew you are better off!
I’ve seen someone’s “green dot” go on after someone called them through Facebook. And if she didn’t want to go out with you why would she give you an excuse after she supposedly ghosted you? Wouldn’t she continue ghosting you?
I can tell you one theory to my last statement. She could be very insecure/ fear of rejection/has a serious deep rooted abandonment trauma in her past. She very well could really want to do the dating game, but without knowing someone before a date she could let fears and insecurities that she’s trying to overcome get the best of her. And because she’s enjoying the pre date validation she wants it to continue, so she tells you an excuse in hopes you can continue talking.
She: oversleeps for what was supposed to be a fun, casual meeting.
You: never in my life have I been so disrespected!
You sound like a narcissist.
Does she have chronic fatigue, depression, is she overworked? You probably don’t even know. But you immediately jump to disrespect.
Sure, she didn’t immediately apologize, but with the attitude you seem to have, I wouldn’t apologize either if I slightly wronged you and you got so pissed off about it.
She dodged a bullet here, it seems….
Eh, move on brother. Chick did this to me just recently bailed on me the first time said was too busy the day of btw. Then I asked specifically hey if you’re still interested let’s shoot for after the holidays. She said yes of course first week of January is good any day on the weekend. Confirmed day and time and place. Message her on Friday hey we’re still good for Sunday? She responds with a fucking ?. I tell her go back to our messages and says oh I totally forgot about that. Get the fuck out of here, deleted and stopped contact. Fucking disrespectful and time wasting.
she could have just left her facebook open by accident, just a thought
Take it as a learning lesson.
If it’s a first date confirming the day before. Sounds like you are a guy who keeps appointments and respects a girl’s time. I’m sure you will find a girl that will respect your time. Relationship is about finding someone that will match your values and lifestyle. It’s hard, but believe you will find that person.