What’s the best response to “Dad, I think I’m gay”?

35 comments

1. “As long as you’re happy!”

   Edit: I wasn’t making a pun, I just want my kids to be happy.

2. Hello Gay, I am dad

3. Hi Gay, I’m Dad.

4. I’m the proud parent of a gay kid then. I love you kid, no matter what.

5. “Well, let’s find out son…”

6. To wife: “Pay up, I won the bet!”

7. GET THE FUCK OUT MY HOUSE

   Edit: I was hoping people would understand that it’s a joke, but nah.

8. Depends who’s saying it. I’d have a lot of questions for most people.

9. Cool son

10. Never should’ve bought you those rollerblades.😡

11. Cool! Let’s go clubbing.

12. So not grandkids? (Go upstairs and throw out all the handmen downs and burn my ultimate playplace project blueprints.)

13. Ok and?

14. Congratulations! Your mother made me gay too!

15. No, you’re Kevin……dumbass

16. Awesome. Now take out the trash.

17. I had a friend who came to me, and I guess I wasn’t excited enough? I don’t know I just replied oh cool I’m glad you felt like you could tell me. So when he told me again I said well I don’t care who you sleep with what do you want like streamers or something?

18. “Called it.”

19. “You’re slow too.”

20. I don’t plan on having any kids, but for fun:

    I’d say “let’s talk about it”. It’s a nicer way of saying “you think? Or you know?” Since this is a sensitive subject that the kid is probably nervous to tell me.

    Maybe I’m weird but I’m 100% straight, but I still wondered “well what would it feel like if I was gay? How would I know?”. Some people obviously know right away. They see another guy and they know they wanna fuck that from an early age. But there have been other gay people that didn’t really know they were gay until adulthood. I know one lesbian at my school that had like 12 BF’s in the first 3 years of HS and then it turned out she was gay senior year.

    So I’d first want to discuss why they think they might be gay and go from there. If what they mean is they know they are gay, but we antes to beat around the bush, the convo pretty much ends there with me being like “alright, cool.” If they actually are unsure, I’d try to be the best resource possible to help them figure it out.

21. So you went from being hoeless, to broless.

22. “I know, now take out the trash”

23. “So?”

24. “I know.”

25. “Well, go check so that you know, instead of just thinking it.”

26. Didn’t know I had a kid in the first place

27. I’ve known since you were a kid and you referred to Bloomingdale’s as “Bloomies”

28. Ok son whatever makes you happy

29. Oh and yeah don’t get married

30. Don’t talk to me until you’re sure.

31. …. what does that have to do with mowing the lawn?

32. Set me up with one of your girlfriends

33. Suck my dick right now to prove it.

34. I’m not a dad myself but when my cousin came out everyone in my family showed him nothing but support. I know that I want to be a dad one day and if I have a kid that comes out as gay I’d still love them. It wouldn’t change anything.

35. I will love you no matter what. But, sexuality is a spectrum, there are is no “I’m gay, or I’m straight”. Unless, that’s what you choose.